Make jokes
Best friend makes joke about 9/11.
Me: My pop was a part of that!
Best friend: So sorry!
Me: My pop was the pilot of the plane, he flew through 89 floors.
Why is everyone trying to make a big deal out of this? My family were only flying to Pakistan and crashed into 2 towers.
I make elevating music; you make elevator music.
Little Johnny said to his mate, "I bet I can make you swear." His mate said, "Good luck." So Johnny told his mate that he slept with his sister. His mate yelled, "I'm gonna fucking kill you!"
Yo momma so fat, when she went for a health consultation, the doc told her to make do with health insurance.
Why would Tommy kill Philza's wife just to make Phil believe she didn't exist?
LIKE AND SUB IF YOU LI/j
How do you make Prince Andrew sad? You tell him you're over 16.
Bitch, I can make orange rhyme with banana. BORNANA.
Eating pork rinds, sword fightin' in pajamas at the crib playin' Fortnite with your grandma.
What's the difference between a blowjob and cough syrup?
They can both give you relief and make you gag at the same time.
What’s the best way to make sure you don’t get COVID?
Suicide.
The poacher agrees but says that his assistant is ill and will need the man to come with him in his assistant's place. The man agrees, and so the poacher goes out to the jungle with the man.
The poacher brings a pair of handcuffs, a long stick, a shotgun, and a dog. They search through the jungle for about an hour and then spot a male gorilla above in the treetops.
The man asks the poacher what the plan is. The poacher replies, "I'm going to climb the tree and, when I get close enough, I'm going to start poking the gorilla with the stick until it falls out of the tree.
The dog is a specially trained dog. When the gorilla falls out of the tree, the dog will try to bite off the gorilla's balls. When the gorilla moves its hands to protect its balls, you put the handcuffs on it."
This all seems to make sense to the man, but he has one question. "What is the shotgun for?" he asks the poacher. The poacher responds: "If I fall out of the tree before the gorilla, shoot the dog."
Why don’t Chinese kids get to celebrate Christmas?
'Cause they're the ones making the toys.
What makes Asians look like they're laughing at everyone? They're squinting before they hear the joke.
People who make these jokes are plain crazy, more crazy than Islamic extremists.
Did you hear they’re making an Elmo toy to appeal to the Tourette’s crowd?
I believe it’s called the “Tic Me Elmo.”
Guys, can we change pride month to another month, please? My birthday is in June, and I'm not gay, and my friends keep making fun of me. I think we should change it to March because my brother's birthday is in March, and that'd be funny.
I made a joke about putting babies in the microwave and got told I was a disgusting person.
So from now on I’ll only make baby in the deep fryer jokes.
I have a better version of this joke.
How to make a plumber cry: Simple, kill his family. That’ll definitely turn on the waterworks.
If two eagles make a baby and two sparrows make a baby, what makes no baby?
Two swallows.
Little Johnny when he makes a Uranus joke:
Little Johnny: I have achieved comedy! 😂😂😂😂😂