Loss

Loss jokes

Finger

Want to hear a joke about a guy losing fingers?

Never mind, it’s too pointless.

Cremation

Setting: Funeral Home

Customer: Yes, I was considering what would be the best option for cheap cremation, but I feel that's silly to ask.

Funeral Director: Oh! We do have these nice urns over here at a discounted 75 percent off.

Customer: Okay? What's the catch? That's almost 300 dollars off?

Funeral Director: I assure you these are top-of-the-line urns and will keep your loved ones' remains secure and dry.

Customer: Okay?

Funeral Director: Yep, these have only been used once, so it is absolutely worth the purchase.

By: MiniMemorials.com

Orphan

What do you call an orphan with parents?

Idk, I never met one before.

Bonus joke: I went up to an orphan and asked where his parents were. He said, "I don’t have any." I said, "Wonder why."

Another bonus joke: Me: Hey. Orphan: Hey. Me: What do you do for fun? Orphan: Look for my parents. Me: Me, so they're not dead? Orphan: No, they just abandoned me.

More bonus: What do you call a homeless kid?

An orphan.

Last bonus: Why don’t orphanages teach kids about home?

Because they can’t find one.

lmao this is so funny, dark humor can be funny. Sorry, orphans!

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  • Orphan

    What's an orphan's favorite toy?

    A boomerang, because it came back unlike their parents.

    Shit

    I thought I told you to lock up when I left this morning. This is why our shit gets stolen all the time!

    Orphan

    Why do orphans become criminals? To know what it’s like to be Wanted.

    Why are orphans bad at poker? They don’t know what a full house is.

    I saw a child crying yesterday, so I asked him where his parents were. Bad move. I got fired from my job at the orphanage.

    What do you call an orphan’s family reunion? Me time.

    Did you know? The letter ‘f’ in orphan stands for family.

    What is an orphan’s least favorite song? "We are Family."

    What’s an orphan’s least favorite TV show? "Family Guy."

    What’s an orphan’s least favorite movie? "Meet the Parents."

    What’s an orphan’s least favorite type of music? House.

    Next: Inappropriate Jokes

    What’s an orphan’s least favorite store? Home Depot.

    What’s an orphan’s favorite band? Foster the People.

    What do you call a virgin from Alabama? An orphan.

    Where do orphan chickens end up? Foster Farms.

    What beer do orphans drink? Foster’s.

    Why do orphans have water with their cereal? Because their dad never came back with the milk.

    What do you call a fish with no parents? An orfin.

    Why do orphans like playing tennis? Because it’s the only love they get.

    Me: Are you an orphan? Orphan: Yes, what gave me away?

    Orphan

    An orphan walks into a shop but gets lost, so he calls his mum but then remembers.

    Orphan

    How do you make an orphan's hands bleed?

    Tell him to clap until his parents come home.

    Orphan

    What is an orphan's favorite day?

    Tomorrow: that is when the sun will come out.

    Orphan

    What's the difference between an orphan and Daniel Larusso?

    At least Daniel has a mom.

    Orphan

    Why can’t orphans have an iPhone?

    Because they can’t find the home button!

    Pilot

    I don't joke about 9/11 because I lost my dad. He was the best pilot I ever knew.

    Orphan

    How do you make an orphan clap until his hands bleed?

    Tell him to clap until his parents come home.