Loss jokes
What's an orphan's least favorite store?
Family Dollar.
What’s an orphan’s least favorite drink?
Milk, because no one came back with any.
Why are orphans bad at baseball?
Because they don’t know where home is.
How do you knock out 26 kids in one punch?
Give them a Sandy Hook.
Why can't an orphan win a baseball game?
Because they can't reach home.
Why can’t an orphan play baseball? Because he can’t find home plate.
Why are orphans bad at poker?
Because they don't know what a full house is.
If someone calls you, reply with this: “Hi, this is Dave’s orphanage and pizzeria, where yesterday’s loss is today’s sauce! How may I assist you today?”
I see a kid crying in the park, right? So I go up to him and say, "Hey, where are your parents?" and he says, "Well, my dad left to get the milk and never came back, and my mother died in a plane crash in the Bermuda Triangle."
Teacher: We have a new student. He's an orphan.
Student: Oof.
Teacher: Is anyone missing?
Student: His parents.
Why did Al Qaeda lose $100 on a bet?
They bet $100 that they wouldn't crash when they went through the Twin Towers.
What do a blind kid and an orphan have in common?
They can’t see their parents.
What's an orphan's favorite toy?
A boomerang because it's the only thing that comes back to it.
What is the orphan's favorite toy from his parents?
They don’t have parents to pay for a toy.
An orphan's family photo: empty.
What's the difference between orphans and apples? Apples get picked.
Why did the family move away?
Because they lost their son.
Mexican runs into a wall. He loses hope.
Why can't orphans hit a home run?
Because they don't have a home to run to...
Kid: What is an orphan's favorite breakfast?
Teacher: What?
Kid: Fruity Pebbles with water.
Teacher: Why water?
Kid: 'Cause his dad never came back with the milk.