Living Jokes

In other news, we are hearing of a nasty helicopter crash on the M4. Let's cross live to our eye-in-the-sky, Mark. Mark?

Whats the difference between crazy people and regular people.

We don't live in their heads

What do you call a jedi teacher who lives in a forest?

Obi Van Canopy

Mary has a house near a forrest she lives with her bro and she once said how many trees are there and her bro said: idk. She said: tree

If I had a coin for every time someone said "If I had a coin" I'd still be living paycheck to paycheck.

My dignity to live

There's a sexy milf that lives next door the only thing better is her 8 Y/O

Conversation between a little baby and a lady👇

👱LADY=hi 💂LIT.BABY=(no reply) 👱LADY=wot is ur name 💂LIT.BABY=no reply 👱LADY=hw old at u 💂LIT.BABY=(no reply) 👱LADY=wot is ur mom's name 💂LIT.BABY=(no reply) 👱LADY=wot about ur dad 💂LIT.BABY=(no reply) 👱LADY=can u spell ur name 💂LIT.BABY=(no reply) 👱LADY= can you spell GOD 💂LIT.BABY=(spelling) G.O.D if a little baby can spell GOD,wot about you. Just spend some minutes and type "GOD" if know u will sleep and wake up tomorrow by GOD's grace,ignore if u are living by power MINE:GOD 😃

My wife went to make a cake the recipe said separate two eggs so she put one egg in the living room

Ho Ho Ho, what do you want for Christmas little boy. Longer than 2 months to live.

What did the bus driver say to the nut 🥜? Where do you live

. why cant depressed kids high five a tree? It will leave them hanging.. . why cant orphans play baseball, Because they cant find home! . a serial killer was at my house all killed all my family but me why, i was in the living room.. . what do sloths and depressed have in common, they both hang off trees.. . what is a group of depressed kids called, the suicide squad

americans live in the U.S.A. the quiet kids live in the U.Z.I.

If bedbugs live beds were do cockroaches live?

Grandma told me that when she passed away she wants to be a tree and so she could live forever.

But it I'm not gonna lie it was a nice toasty fire...

A man has a terminal illness and isn't sure how long he has left to live, so he talks to his doctor. The man asks "How long am I going to live?" The doctor says "Depends, what time is it?" The doctor then looks at his watch and says"10" The man asks "Ten what?" Then the doctor keeps going"6, 5, 4, 3, 2, 1"

what's the difference between a mole and an eagle?

they both live underground, except for the eagle

What do you call a person in a wheelchair that lives in africa? Dry Vegeatable

your whife dompd you becose you or so poor and you or so ugly you olsow live under a rock and hav no monny you got dumpt so hord you cant rememder you got dumps.