Living Jokes

What do you call a rejected guitarist who now lives on the beach?

A sea minor.

Why do orphans live in a orphanage

Answer: because they are wanted there

A computer is like a living organism. Its charger is its life support. If you "pull the plug" you are letting it slowly die.

Did u know a erasor on a pencil slowly dies of your mistakes and did u know your actually supposed to live for 25 min but every time u breath resets time

This joke includes potentially sensitive content.

Little boy asked his dad why was he was born black. Father replied, so the heat from the sun doesn't burn your skin. Then he asks why is our hair all frizzy like fuse wire. So the coconuts when falling from the trees won't hurt you. Then what are we doing living in Rochdale. (England)

H: *walks into bedroom* Why are you packing your bags?

W: I heard in New York women get paid $400 for what I do for you for free.

*Later that day*

W: *walks into the bedroom to see husband packing his bags* What are you doing?

H: I’m going with you. I want to see how you live off of $800 a year.

My mom told me that she got a new job & I don't have to leave the house. Then my mom told all my customers are the men that live in our neighborhood Then I ask what is your job call. My mom said job hand, then I said job and or is hand job . My mom said yeah that it. My mom said I;m good at my job that why all the males are always knocking at the door.

I remember when I was at a funeral at the age of 6. I was with my grandma and asked, "Grandma, Grandma. Why is that man in a box?" and she says, "He's in a better place now." I look at her confused and ask, "WHAT KIND OF BOX DID HE LIVE IN BEFORE?! HOW IS THIS BOX BETTER THAN THE LAST ONE?! IT'S JUST A BOX!" And to this day I am still not allowed to go to funerals.

This joke includes potentially sensitive content.

in america 1 in 10 houses there are a paedophiles

not me i live next to a smoking hot 8 year old

How am I an ableist? My ex girlfriend was in a wheelchair and we lived in the same old building with a broken elevator. I ended the relationship by moving to 8th floor.

We are always joking around about being adopted, when really we are still living in the orphanage.

What's a kind of cat that lives in the water? Octopus _____

I live next to a kindergarten and yesterday they had a fire drill. It was kinda weird because normally it's me who has a drill around little children.

Mr.Smith lived in an apartment. in the apartment, he went to the elevator and went to the 16th floor then he went to the 21st floor by 5 stairs every morning. why did he do that?

because he was too short!! so he pressed the highest button he could and went to his apartment