Lifestyle jokes
What's the difference between Elton John and rapboat?
Elton is talented, rich, and openly gay. Rapboat got fuck all talent, no money, and is not out of the closet yet.
What do gay people call fighting? It can't be beef, so...
Carrots?
Why do vegans use blowjobs?
Because they can’t take real meat.
What’s one thing that a gay person is scared of?
A gay guy that’s straight!
I like my coffee like my men, long and black.
I thought the dryer made my clothes shrink.
Turns out it was the fridge.
Why did the emo kid not cross the road?
He was waiting for a car.
Why don’t some couples go to the gym?
Because some relationships don’t work out.
A new drug has been developed for lesbians with depression.
It’s called Trycoxagain.
I'm gay and an orphan.
How much drugs did Charlie Sheen take?
Enough to kill two and a half men.
Why are gay people bad at hide and seek?
Because they're always coming out of the closet.
Why is the day you do laundry, cook, clean, iron, and so on called a day off?
I wish my grass was emo, it would cut itself.
Roses are red, oranges are orange.
Get a life, quit watching porn.
Imagine being emo.
Couldn't be me.
Who cooks in a lesbian relationship?
Neither one of them, they eat out.
What do you call two emos spending time together?
Hanging out.
What's the difference between an emo and my clothes?
My clothes don't hang themselves.
What is the coolest bath bomb for emos?
A toaster.