Least jokes

Kids when they meet a kid out of home alone be like: “At least your mom came back!”

B: Can you please stop roasting me?

A: At least the "roasting" that I did to you didn't burn you to death.

Someone locked me out of my house today... At least the children in my basement aren't my problem anymore.

My friend is gonna release an air strike. There has to be at least 20 confirmed toilet kills.

My mom told me, "You son of a b!tch." I told her, "I may be a son of a b!ch but at least I am not the bitch." She hated me forever.

People should build orphanages next to graveyards so at least orphans can see their parents.

What's the difference between a newborn baby and an orphan after a rugby match?

They both come out bloody and crying, but at least one gets picked up.

What's an orphan's least favorite joke?

Dad jokes.

What is an orphan's least favorite snack?

"Dots HOMESTYLE Pretzels!"

What is an orphan’s least favorite movie?

"Spider-Man," because it told them there was no way home.

I love going to church to get closer to God, but my least favorite part of church has to be touching the priest’s penis.

I was invited into a celebrity's house, that's what I told the cops at least...

Why are you so bonely, my friend? I am at least glad that you are not boneless.

A man puts in ten jokes into a joke contest. He hopes that at least one will win. Sadly, no pun intended.

I was making a bet with my grandfather about who would die first. I said that I would die first.

He said "Bet" and died after he drank his coffee.

He was my least favorite grandparent.

Did you hear that Michael Jackson changed his name from Michael Smith? Well, at least he's honest.

My brother finally got his driver's license, so he took our new car out for a spin.

At least now I can have his phone he left.

Q: What's a ship's least favorite food? A: Iceburg-ers

I recently saw a pun contest in NYC. The owners said there was a maximum of 10 puns that I could submit. I wrote 10 puns and submitted all of them in hopes that at least one would win--however, no pun in ten did.

A 10 year old girl meets with her doctor. The doctor tells her “Katie, I’m sorry to have to tell you that your parents didn’t survive the accident. Sadly, our tests also show that you have early onset Alzheimer’s disease.”

Katie replies “well at least my parents will look after me.”