At school, Little Johnny’s classmate tells him that most adults are hiding at least one dark secret, so it’s very easy to blackmail them by saying, “I know the whole truth.” Little Johnny decides to go home and try it out. Johnny’s mother greets him at home, and he tells her, “I know the whole truth.” His mother quickly hands him $20 and says, “Just don’t tell your father.” Quite pleased, the boy waits for his father to get home from work, and greets him with, “I know the whole truth.” The father promptly hands him $40 and says, “Please don’t say a word to your mother.” Very pleased, the boy is on his way to school the next day when he sees the mailman at his front door. The boy greets him by saying, “I know the whole truth.” The mailman immediately drops the mail, opens his arms, and says, “Then come give your Daddy a great big hug!”
What’s the difference between a priest and acne? At least acne waits til the boy is 12 to come on his face.
A man goes for his annual checkup. Afterwords he’s sitting the the doctor’s office and the doctor comes in with the results of his tests. The doctor says, “I have some bad news; you have cancer and Alzheimer’s.” The man replies, “well, at least I don’t have cancer.”
what’s the difference between a feminist and suicide vest
a least one does something when it is triggered
I saw a man sitting on the ledge of a bridge the other day, and asked him what was wrong. He responded with nobody loves me, so i told him that may be true but you dont wanna kill yourself you want to die of old age, or at least be murdered, suicide is for the weak. he responded with your right so I pushed him over the bridge, and he died of murder
On Xbox live an orphan can say they f ed your mom so you can say at least mine didnt die from it.
There was the person who sent ten different puns to his friends, with the hope that at least one of the puns would make them laugh. No pun in ten did.
Orphan boy:Your dad is probably dissapointed of you i mean look at you Me: well at least my parents kept me wheres yours
Say what you want about Pedophiles but at least they drive slow through school zones
Crucifixion - only one guy who nailed it… at least Jesus didn’t get screwed over, but I bet he was pretty cross about being forced to hang around.
Old man goes to the doctor. The doctor says “The test results are back, and I’m sad to say you have cancer and Alzheimer’s.”. The old man says “Phew! At least it’s not cancer!”
What’s the difference between Hitler and a feminist?
At least Hitler actually did something
the last thing i told my ex after we broke up was “at least we’re still cousins”😂
My mum told me to stop playing with my sister; she said at least wait for her to be born first.
Paul Walker’s death was a tragedy, but at least he went out in a blaze of glory.
What did the dime say to the penny? At least I have more cents than you.
So a blind man walks into a bar.
At least he thinks so.
What’s an emo person’s least favorite game??? Cut The Rope.
Me and my little brother were playing Call Of Duty. He wasn’t doing very good so I told him so. My brother said to me, “at least I don’t have to camp in order to get kills”. I then responded with, “I would call you cancer, but at least cancer kills”.
My friend’s mother was never a font of sympathy, but always the one to see beyond the darkness. Upon learning about her daughter’s cancer diagnosis she said, “Well honey, at least you’ll lose some weight!"