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At school, Little Johnny’s classmate tells him that most adults are hiding at least one dark secret, so it’s very easy to blackmail them by saying, “I know the whole truth.” Little Johnny decides to go home and try it out. Johnny’s mother greets him at home, and he tells her, “I know the whole truth.” His mother quickly hands him $20 and says, “Just don’t tell your father.” Quite pleased, the boy waits for his father to get home from work, and greets him with, “I know the whole truth.” The father promptly hands him $40 and says, “Please don’t say a word to your mother.” Very pleased, the boy is on his way to school the next day when he sees the mailman at his front door. The boy greets him by saying, “I know the whole truth.” The mailman immediately drops the mail, opens his arms, and says, “Then come give your Daddy a great big hug!”

Say what you want about Pedophiles but at least they drive slow through school zones

what’s the difference between a feminist and suicide vest

a least one does something when it is triggered

A man goes for his annual checkup. Afterwords he’s sitting the the doctor’s office and the doctor comes in with the results of his tests. The doctor says, “I have some bad news; you have cancer and Alzheimer’s.” The man replies, “well, at least I don’t have cancer.”

What’s the difference between a priest and acne? At least acne waits til the boy is 12 to come on his face.

What’s an emo person’s least favorite game??? Cut The Rope.

I saw a man sitting on the ledge of a bridge the other day, and asked him what was wrong. He responded with nobody loves me, so i told him that may be true but you dont wanna kill yourself you want to die of old age, or at least be murdered, suicide is for the weak. he responded with your right so I pushed him over the bridge, and he died of murder

My mum told me to stop playing with my sister; she said at least wait for her to be born first.

Crucifixion - only one guy who nailed it… at least Jesus didn’t get screwed over, but I bet he was pretty cross about being forced to hang around.

There was the person who sent ten different puns to his friends, with the hope that at least one of the puns would make them laugh. No pun in ten did.

What does your first football game and your first time having sex have in common? You were bloody and battered but at least you’re dad came.

What’s the difference between Hitler and a feminist?

At least Hitler actually did something

What did the dime say to the penny? At least I have more cents than you.

Old man goes to the doctor. The doctor says “The test results are back, and I’m sad to say you have cancer and Alzheimer’s.”. The old man says “Phew! At least it’s not cancer!”

A man puts in ten jokes into a joke contest. He hopes that at least one will. Sadly, no pun InTenDid.

What is Hitler’s least favorite month?

Jewly.

Paul Walker’s death was a tragedy, but at least he went out in a blaze of glory.

8008135 is my favorite number. The worst ratio is 6:9. And last but not least, "Why was six afraid of seven?’ Seven eight nine. But why was six with nine? Because when you put them together you get 69. But why was six mad at nine? Because Nine eight six two.

What’s the differencd between prison and concentration camps? At least you don’t die when you shower.

So a blind man walks into a bar.

At least he thinks so.