There was a fire at my high school when I was in Year 7 - When the local newspaper interviewed my teacher, they asked her how she was seeing the 'bright side' of it. She said "Well, at least our new students got a warm welcome" 54 students died that day.
What's a depressed person's least favorite type of cereal?
LIFE.
One of the most popular documentaries of the 2010’s was “Jiro Dreams of Sushi.”
One of the least popular documentaries was “Jiro’s Nightmare of Ass-Rape.”
My friend committed suicide yesterday... At least he went out with a bang.
2 guys are captured by native chinese they give them 2 choices 1. Death 2. 他妈的 The first guy: what's 他妈的? The chinese fucking The first guy chooses death Second guy to himself: well ill let this sick fucks fuck me at least ill be alive... The chinese :come on we don't have all day Second guy:i chose 他妈的 The chinese: ok 他妈的 to the death
I was talking to a muslem yesterday, And he asked me what it's like to be blind. I happened to tell him about 20 jokes, in fact I was working on my twentieth. So I answered with "At least I don't have to screw in light bulbs. It 's not like I need the damn things anyway.
Bully: your so short u hand-glide on a chip
Short person: welll at least I don’t look like a Giraffe that just came out of an oven
Orphan boy: "Your dad is probably disappointed in you. I mean, look at you."
Me: "Well, at least my parents kept me. Where are yours?"
So anyway, this old guy goes to the doctors. The doctor says "It's bad news, you've got cancer and Alzheimers". The old guy replies "At least I've not got cancer".
What's an orphan's least favorite joke?
...YO MAMA SOO, Oh wait...
What is an orphan's least favorite movie? Home.
What's a fish's least favorite instrument?
A ClariNET!
Every time I go to the store I look in the deodorant section and my dyslexia acts up. Instead of "antiperspirant," I read "antidepressant." At least I get a bunch of extra snacks out of my shopping mistakes
Paddy and Seamus work at the Guinness factory, and Seamus has a horrible accident and dies at work.
Paddy agrees to tell Seamus' wife the bad news. He knocks on the door, and Seamus' wife answers. "What's happened, Paddy?" Paddy frowns. "I'm sorry to say poor Seamus fell into the Guinness vat and drowned, I'm so sorry." She started to cry and asked Paddy: "Did he at least die quickly?" Seamus shook his head, "No, he got out 3 times for a pee."
An old woman goes to the doctor complaining of extremely smelly gas.
"I don't understand it, Doc," she said, "I have this terrible, terrible gas." "Thankfully," she added, "they are at least silent when I fart."
Doctor hands her a bottle of pills, tells her take them all and then come back to see him.
The old woman returned a short time later extremely mad. "I took those pills like you said and not only is my gas smelly, but now when I fart they are obnoxiously loud!", she yelled.
The doctor said, "well, now that we've solved your hearing problem, let's see what we can do about that gas".
Q: What kind of building weighs the least? A: A Lighthouse!
Me and my little brother were playing Call Of Duty. He wasn't doing very good, so I told him so. My brother said to me, "At least I don't have to camp in order to get kills." I then responded with, "I would call you cancer, but at least cancer kills."
Grandma I can’t believe I have Alzheimer’s One second later Well at least I don’t have Alzheimer’s
A brother and a sister always got into fights. One day the brother tells the sister, "You're adopted!" The sister yells back, "At least they wanted me!"
What's a Mexican's least favorite lesson in art? Drawing border lines.
