Please help, my dad is an addict. He won't stop, and he eats my food.
Sometimes I think, should I kill him? But nah, he will go down with the others who did that too.
Law Jokes
Why do orphans play GTA5 so much?
So they could be wanted.
Ok, I put one penny down. Do you smell anything?
1 scent.
I put two pennies down. Do you see any fruit?
2 pears.
I put three pennies down. Do you see any law enforcement?
3 coppers.
I put four pennies down. Do you see any cars?
4 Lincolns.
I put five pennies down. Do you see any pussies?
NOT FOR 5 CENTS YOU DONT!
I hate double standards. Burn a body at a crematorium and you’re being a respectful friend.
But do it at home and you’re destroying evidence.
Me: 911, I just killed someone.
Cops: Cool, we will not come.
Me: Why?
Cops: Don't admit a crime.
Phones: *Bang Bang*
Me: Well, that was 2 crimes done.
Why can't orphans have sex?
Because they have no one to call "daddy."
Why does an orphan play GTA?
To get wanted.
Yesterday I had a party.
I got questioned about five dead kids locked up in a box.
I did that when I was 13. Damn, I forgot about them!
What is the most common crime in China?
Identity fraud.
My friend walked down the street and peed on a car.
Today sucked. My friend fell off a cliff, and I went to jail.
Orphan kids only play GTA5 so they can be wanted.
Why did the orphan play GTA? Because he wanted to feel the wanted level.
We the jury are yet to deliver our final verdict, but we would like to have a guess.
Is it Mrs. Peacock with the candlestick in the library?
Why can't Trump go to the White House anymore? Because it's forbidden!
In Israel, they chop convicted rapists' balls off. Sure glad I don't live in Israel.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Fishes.
Fishes who?
Fishes the police, come out with your hands up!
Rape is not a joke.
If you're ever bored, just slap an orphan. What are they going to do, tell their parents?
Once a naked woman robs a bank, but sadly, no one can remember her face...
