Law jokes
Amber Heard Daily Routine:
Get out of bed, drink coffee, take a shit on Johnny Depp's bed.
Orphans can be a robber if they want because their parents won't be disappointed.
What do you call a Muslim in America being pursued by a perv?
Alien vs. Predator.
What do you call a not potty trained human?
Amber Heard.
Why do pedophiles come in last place for every race... because they are always in the back (if you know what I mean)?
If you're ever bored just fuck some orphans, what are they gonna do, tell their parents?
Why can't an orphan get a vaccine?
They need parental permission.
Why did the judge dismiss court when the orphan walked in?
Even a gay prison wouldn't want him.
Why did the bounty hunter not cash in an orphan?
He was not worth keeping.
The doctor gave his patient 1 day of life, so he shot him. Then the judge gave him 15 years, so there you go, problem solved.
"Ahoy, Spongebob! I just committed homicide in Syria, and the one-party state is after my fucking ass! Argagagagagaga!"
Why did the ducks go to jail?
They sold quack.
Q: Why can orphans never be criminals?
A: Because they're never wanted.
Why do orphans commit crimes?
To be wanted.
One day an orphan went to jail, and a big dude went behind him and said, "I want you." The orphan said, "Finally!"
I went home and I saw my friend kissing my sister. I said, "What’s going on?" They both told me that they’re going out with each other. I said, "Alright."
The next morning, I see my friend kissing my mom. I said, "What’s going here?" They both told me they’re going out with each other. Then my friend said to me, "I gave you 3 gifts. 1 gift, I’m your best friend. 2 gift, I’m your new brother-in-law. 3 gift, I’m your new stepfather." I felt so happy I had a friend that [is] looking out for me.
How do rapists justify murdering a young innocent human being?
Same way as pro-aborts, by saying "My body, my choice!"
Why do orphans become criminals?
To feel what it is like to be wanted.
How do you verify a rape claim? You make it true, and then the person is a victim for sure.
"INNOCENT! THERE IS NO WAY TO PROVE THAT THE GIRL WAS 13. It doesn't matter what texts he sent. There is no way to prove that the girl was 13, or the fact that it was a girl. Failed sting operation."