Laughter jokes
I played piano at a Worthmore disabled elderly center. Then after I was done, I said, "How about you give me a standing ovation?"
I regret it to this day. Now I am forced to live here at Worthmore, and sit on my wheelchair, sad and lonely.
So there was this girl and her horse would not stop following her, so she said, "Stop horsing around!"
Get it? "Horse-ing."
Why are the jokes fat? Because you made it.
Why do planets circle the sun?
'Cause they like the game of ring-around-the-rosy.
Zozo laughed at his wife for her husband being a hobo.
I am going to scream, this is a cry for help.
What did a comedian say at a show full of blind people?
"What's up?"
Wanna hear a paper joke? Nvm, it's terrible.
Me: "You wanna see my dad?"
Some kid: "Yeah?"
Me: "Close your eyes and he will appear."
Some kid: "He ain't appearing."
Me: "Sorry I thought he would appear for you. He won't appear for me."
*The kid laughs*
Moral: Not everything is supposed to be funny text if you notice what was really going on. 🙃
Stop making jokes about Kobe.
Why did Sarah fall off the swing?
Because she has no arms.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Not Sarah.
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Stop! Stop the orphan jokers!
I was chopping onions with my brothers, so my little sisters cried. Onions was a good dog.
What do you call an autistic kid with a rocket ship? A cocker.
Why did the chair file a restraining order?
The booty wouldn't stop cracking up!
What’s a booty’s favorite game?
Hide and cheek.
What should I write a joke about? Name the subject, and I’ll make a joke about it.
So I walk into a bar, and there’s people waiting in line to punch me in the face.
That’s the punch line.
What’s up with the foot feet?
What is the plural of "goose"? "Geese."
What is the plural of moose? Well, it ant meese.
Well, it’s my first joke. Please forgive me if it’s bad.