Laughter jokes
Why can an orphan never get picked up?
Because the white van did not come that day. HAHA BIG LOL
Me: Wanna hear a joke?
Person: Sure.
Me: Never mind, I was gonna say my life, but my life isn't a joke! Jokes have meaning.
Person: Dear God...
What is the difference between an orphan and a blind kid?
They both can’t see their parents. 😂😂😂😂😂
So I walk into a bar, and there’s people waiting in line to punch me in the face.
That’s the punch line.
A bus full of nuns falls off a cliff and they all die. They arrive at the gates of heaven and meet St. Peter. St. Peter says to them, “Sisters, welcome to Heaven. In a moment I will let you all through the pearly gates, but before I may do that, I must ask each of you a single question.”
St. Peter turns to the first nun in the line and asks her, “Sister, have you ever touched a penis?” The Sister responds, “Well... there was this one time... that I kinda sorta... touched one with the tip of my pinky finger...” St. Peter says, “Alright Sister, now dip the tip of your pinky finger in the Holy Water, and you may be admitted.” and she did so.
St. Peter now turns to the second nun and says, “Sister, have you ever touched a penis?” “Well.... There was this one time... that I held one for a moment...” “Alright Sister, now just wash your hands in the Holy Water, and you may be admitted” and she does so.
Now at this, there is a noise, a jostling in the line. It seems that one nun is trying to cut in front of another! St. Peter sees this and asks the Nun, “Sister Susan, what is this? There is no rush!” Sister Susan responds, “Well if I’m going to have to gargle this stuff, I’d rather do it before Sister Mary sticks her ass in it!”
What do you call an emo committing suicide while filming it?
America's Funniest Home Videos.
This is a short joke! This short joke is long. Nice joke, Mr. Steve.
Me, an orphan: *laughing at orphan jokes*
Some person: Stop laughing, it's sad to laugh at your pain.
Me, an orphan: That's the funny part, what am I going to do, tell my parents?
What were the candles doing at a birthday party?
Getting lit.
What makes a child an orphan?
Their parents left them for good. :D
My friend who is in a wheelchair told me a joke, and I burst out laughing. I told him he should be a stand-up comedian.
My friend in a wheelchair tells a funny joke.
I resist the urge to say that he should become a stand-up comedian.
This joke is so funny, I'll bet you greened (grinned).
How can you tell when a female was raped? She crossed herself out.
I was an orphan as a kid, and I'm pretty sure my favorite thing was seeing parents with their kids.
I think we know why.
I would tell you a recycling joke.
But I’m afraid it’d just be reused over and over.
What do you call a blind kid with an eye patch and no arms?
Names.
Do you like CDs?
There's this really cool one called "C Deez Nuts."
Luckily for you, mirrors can't talk, and luckily for you, they can't laugh either.
Russia—the real joke.