Knee jokes

What do you call a Japanese person when their knees are cured?

"Happynese" (happy knees).

Little Mickel was on a tree.

He fell down and hurt his knee.

He sat down and started to cry, and from there, he would never lie.

Can you imagine what was the last thing that went through their brains?

The knee caps.

Yo what quacking lacking? Looking for a ducking good time? I've got some one lines and knee slappers that ought to fix the bill. What happens flied upside down? It quacks up.

Why did the dog want a kiss? Because he can see his knees.

Mary had a great big ram, his fleece was white as snow, when on hands and knees our Mary went, his wad was sure to blow.

Month by month her belly grew, increasing in its girth, and when five months had flown by, our Mary did give birth.

And Mary had a little lamb, a little lamb, a little lamb...

A man walks into a bar. He sees a family court judge, his wife, her lawyer, and a police officer. He gets on his hands and knees and prays to God out loud. The bartender says, "Why are you praying?" He says, "Because I just saw the 4 horsemen of the apocalypse, and the bible tells me when I see them the end is at hand."

What do you call a Chinese hooker that won't get on her knees?

Cantonese...

Why did the cowboy die with his boots on??

He didn’t want to stub his toe when he kicked da bucket 😂🤣👌🏻👌🏻.. knee slapper

My dog stepped on a bee, My child spilt my tea, I drank my hot tea, I broke my bloody knee, Now I'm lying in agony, And I'm devastated with no glee.

(Again, credits to my really funny friend)

What is Uranus' favorite exercise? ... Hy knees.

If George Floyd was in the new Little Mermaid: Under da knee Under da knee Counterfeit 20 Drugs I took plenty Now I can’t breathe

Did you hear about the story of the husband who told his wife she’d look sexier with her hair back?

Apparently, that’s not a nice thing to say to cancer patients.

A young man cracked a joke about dementia to his friend on the bus. The old man sitting next to him politely asked, “Can you stop making jokes about terminal diseases?”

He replied, “Yes, I cancer.” Then he cracked tumor.

EMINEM: His palms are sweaty, knees weak, arms are heavy.

WebMD: Cancer.

Why doesn't a Muslim girl like her dad and namaz?

Because she has to get on her knees.

Jesus was being hung up on the cross, and me and all the other people at the bottom of the hill were watching. Jesus cries out,

"Peter, Peter come to me!"

So I climb up the hill on my hands and knees, and when I reach the top, the Romans cut off my arms and chuck me back down the hill.

"Peter, Peter come to me!" cries Jesus once more. I stumble up the hill, then the Romans cut my legs off and threw me back down. For the third time, Jesus cries,

"Peter, Peter come to me!". So I wriggle up the hill, and I guess the Romans pitied me and let me through.

"Look Peter, I can see my house from here!"

Why do crabs never give to charity? Because they’re shellfish.

Hahahahahahahaha what a knee slapper!

What's George Floyd's favorite color? Kneeon.

What is George Floyd's favorite shade of color? Kneeon.

The woman's body is shaped like a penis. If see a naked female body bent over, her butt looks like testicles, while her head can be seen as the head of a penis.

This is the same if she lies down right side up with her knees up and legs spread. If she lays upside down with her knees up and legs spread, her boobs are like testicles and her pelvic area is like the head of a penis. If you look at the shape of a vagina, it’s shaped like a penis with the lips looking like testicles and the clit looks like the schlong.

What do Christians and gays have in common?

They both say, “Oh God” when they get on their knees.