Kids jokes
A kid asks his mom what dark humor is.
She says, “You see that man with no arms, tell him to clap.”
“But mom, I’m blind!” says the kid.
“Exactly,” replied the mom.
Why couldn't the teacher let her kids out?
Because she has no arms to open the door.
I can smell your kids!
These girls were bullying a kid. I asked if they were raping him. They stopped.
I gave the blind kid a gun and called it a hair dryer.
Kid 123, how's downline Orphan what? Home! 😂😂😂😂😂 Sorry.
Teacher: Hey Timmy (the quiet kid), what comes after X?
The quiet kid: Splosion.
Teacher: What comes after A?
The quiet kid: AK-47.
Teacher: Faints.
What did the blind kid get for his birthday?
I don't know, he still didn't look.
When the school shooter is about to leave your classroom and the autistic kid's Sketchers light up.
What does the SpongeBob intro and a pedophile have in common?
"Are you ready kids?"
What does an orphan and a lost kid have in common?
They have no way home.
Mia’s mother has 5 kids: Lilly, Abby, Alexa, Mila, and.... Q: Who is last? A: Mia.
Knock, knock. Who’s there? Little old lady. Little old lady who? Little old lady, you don’t need to yodel about it!
Dora, where do we go next?
Kids at home: Area 51.
Meanwhile,
Dora: Let’s go deliver the evidence to President Biden.
1 day later,
Dora: WE DID IT, HOORAY!
Jack and Jill went up the hill to smoke some marijuana.
Jack got high, touched Jill's thigh, and said, "I know you wanna."
But silly Jill forgot her pill, and now they have a kid.
"I met a girl and she's 28."
"Now I'm the coolest guy in all of 8th grade."
- AJR
How do you name a Chinese kid?
Throw a frying pan on their head, "Ching Chong!"
What do clothes and emo kids have in common?
They both get hung.
Russians think they are tougher than Americans. Here are some reasons for the Russians out here reading this:
1. USA was NEVER invaded!
2. USA never commits as many war crimes as Russia does!
3. USA made the first nuclear weapon so yeah shove that up your ass, Russians!
4. Our soldiers don’t rape kids.
5. We have more allies than you.
6. We are smaller but stronger.
7. Random civilians in the USA have stronger guns than Russian military does!
Why is Mrs. Grapes 🍇 a good mother?
Because she loves raisin' kids.
It’s like I always tell my kids:
"Two in the pink, one in the stink."