Kids jokes
These girls were bullying a kid. I asked if they were raping him. They stopped.
"Ugly kid, I feel ugly."
"Me? You don't have feel ugly, you already ugly."
Why do kids like to pick on orphans?
Because they can't call their parents.
I once saw a kid walking down the street crying. So I asked them, "Hey kid, where are your parents?" And he started to cry even more...
"Huh. I wonder why he was so sad..." I said as I walked into the orphanage.
These nine kids were being bullied by these 10 guys in an alley. So, I thought I would help.
It was 9/11 all over again.
What's the similarities between dark humor and cancer?
It's funnier when kids get it.
What's a pedophile's favorite fast food meal?
In-N-Out of kids.
One man said, "The audacity on that deaf kid!"
The other man said, "Bro, does he even have audio?"
So, a mom and a dad take their son to a therapist.
“What seems to be the problem?” the therapist asked.
“Our son thinks he’s a refrigerator!” they said.
So the therapist replies, “Oh dear, that must be a problem.”
“Yeah, he sleeps with his mouth open, and the light is really bright.”
Q. Why did the kid drop his ice cream cone?
A. Because he got hit by a truck.
Why do emo kids cost so much?
Because they’re the only people you can scan at the checkout machine.
An emo kid and a silent kid would be a good acquaintance because the emo would wish to die, and the silent kid would be the nice guy and grant that wish.
What do you call a gay kid that is on fire?
LGBBQ
I gave a blind kid a gun and said it was a hair dryer.
"Jordan, motherfucker, your face looks like a slut, and your life is trash. Stop picking on kids and LEAVE THEM HELL ALONE!"
Have a sink in your house? Eat it.
Have a mouse in your house? Kill it.
Have a child in your house? MICROWAVE IT.
...just kidding. Now watch this video: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y5tjtUFL0j4
What were the Fortnite kid's last words? "I didn't know pumps are back in the game!"
I bought an orphan kid an iPhone.
Guess what? It had no home button.
What's the difference between a Lambo and 200 children in my basement? One screams; the children don't.
I can't imagine him moaning with the kids, "Hi, uh, ya daddy, uh HEE!"