Kids jokes
What is the difference between an adopted kid and an orphan?
If you're adopted, you're actually wanted.
What does an emo kid and pizza have in common?...... The pizza doesn’t cut itself.
I saw some kids bullying a kid in a wheelchair. I grabbed the kid, pushed him down the stairs, and said, "GTA physics."
What do you call an emo kid at the bottom of the ocean?
A good start.
What's got 5 arms, 3 legs, and 2 feet? The finish line at the Boston Marathon.
What did the boy with no hands get for Christmas? Gloves! Nah, just kidding... He still hasn't unwrapped his present.
Kid goes to the kitchen.
Mom: What are you doing here?
Kid: Just checking out the knife.
Mom: So you've chosen death.
I got detention one day. I don’t know why; I only slapped the emo kid on the wrist.
When I saw a kid fall with no legs, I said, "Just walk it off!"
Why did the depressed kid jump off the bike? It was free depressed day.
What's the difference between a rubber and Michael Jackson? Nothing, kids touch them both.
How can you tell an anti-vaccine kid?
It's only got 10 hours to live.
Oh, Lois, that was more scary than Michael Jackson without pants in front of a kid!
Sorry for this Pick Up Line.
Are you a building? Because I rate you 9/11, so let me put my plane in and let kids fall out.
My teacher said, "Say welcome to our new student; he's an orphan." The teacher said, "Is anyone missing?" I said, "That kid's parents."
What's a deaf kid's favorite words?
"Shut up."
When you have to fight an emo kid, but he brings his friends, so you gotta fight the Suicide Squad. But you gotta get the boys to help you.
Are you a school? 'Cause I wanna shoot kids in you.
I asked this disabled kid what his favorite TV show is. He looked at me blankly and said "My favorite TV show is Vegetales."
What makes depressed kids jump?
Bridges!
Girl: I’m so in love with you!
Boy: Me too. I think you’re abcdefghijk: aesthetic, beautiful, cool, determined, elegant, famous, hot.
Girl: What’s the ijk?
Boy: I’m just kidding.