Kids jokes
What do you call a kid with no home?
A homeless kid.
So I went up to a crying kid and asked, "Where's your mommy?"
God, I love working at an orphanage.
What would a tree do if a depressed kid tried to high five it?
I would leave them hanging.
- All over it like a fat kid on a cupcake.
- Giggling like a room full of fat kids.
- Drinking 8 cups of water a day seems impossible, but 8 beers and 3 shots in 3 hours goes down like a fat kid on a seesaw.
What do you call a kid that lives alone?
An orphan. ;)
Memes
Antivaxers be like
Why do orphans hate going in public?
Because there's kids out with their parents.
An orphan was playing with a famous baseball player. The baseball player walks up to him and says, "Dude, I gotta teach you." The orphan goes, "Why? I got all your moves down." The baseball player goes, "But kid, you can never find home, though."
This is a bad one but why do orphans hate their life even more in 2021?
Cause kids just laugh at them...
Wat is a kids gajfnjafb movie? A sjdhfsdjfmksdf LOL
I put my heart and soul in my report, then my teacher says:
"Hey KIDS were going to repeat making current events about our state til we DIE."
....No wonder when kids leave school they're soulless.
RIP Meh Soul.
Why did the adopted kid eat the last cookie? Because he was the only one left to adopt; everyone hated him.
Why doesn't Santa have kids? Because he only comes once a year.
Why couldn't the kid with Down syndrome play football? Because he got all the downs.
What is a kid who loves school?
A smart kid.
Ms. Katie: I heard about a Vegan baby.
Mom: Here’s your Happy Meal.
Ms. Katie: That’s not vegan, did you trick me?
Kids: Yeah!
Ms. Katie: That’s it, little baby Jimmy, I’m giving you shaking baby syndrome!
Mom: Please don’t hurt my son.
*Ms. Katie shakes Jimmy*
Mom: I’m secretly a cop, and you are arrested.
The Cheerio Joke
Let's say you're in high school, and your popularity level was based on what Cheerio you are. So there's Extra-Frosty Cheerios as the most popular kids, the frosted Cheerios were the popular kids, the Regular Cheerios as the typical normal kid, then there's the honey nut Cheerios as the nerds and geeks, and then there's your Cheerio which is the Chocolate Cheerios. Now you want to ask this girl who's an extra frosty, you go up to her and ask her to Homecoming, but she declines.
So after school gets out, you go home and rewind. The next day you wake up feeling like a honey nut Cheerio, so you go up to her again and ask her again, she still says no. So you go home and rewind again and wake up the next morning feeling like a Regular Cheerio. So you go to school and ask her again, she still declines. So you go home and rewind again. The next morning, you wake up feeling like a frosty Cheerio. So you go up to her and ask again, still says no. Then you go home and unwind. The next day you wake up feeling like an extra frosty Cheerio. Feeling doubtful, you go up to her one last time and ask her. She finally says yes.
The next day is Homecoming, and you and your date are on the dance floor, and she wants punch. So she tells you that she's going to go get punch. She goes and gets punch and is back in 30 seconds. You ask her why it was so fast. She replies with; "Oh there wasn't a punch line."
These nine kids were being bullied by these 10 guys in an alley. So, I thought I would help.
It was 9/11 all over again.
I thought that kid was walking cool when I had my ears shut. It turns out he was moaning.
Why did Sally drop her ice cream cone?
Because she got hit by a bus.
What did the pedophile say to the kids?
"FUCK!"