Kids jokes
Hey kids, guess who started a micronation?
It’s Barney and Trump. They don’t let gays in, but they kill them.
So I was looking through my pictures and I found a picture of a random kid that took a picture of his ugly face. It looked like someone that got hit by a car, then a bus, then a semi.
That’s what I get for not having a password on my iPad.
What do you call someone who kisses primary school kids?
Joshua Metcalfe
Teacher: Ok kids, time to go home.
The orphan: What is home?
Teacher: Here, I have somewhere for you.
*puts in trash can*
Tired kid with asthma: "It's hard to breathe."
Gym Teacher: "That's alright."
Other Kid: "Hush!"
Kid says, “Are you a soldier?”
Soldier says, “Mhm.”
Kid says, “I wanna be a soldier someday.”
Soldier says, “Really?”
The kid says, “Yeah, but father says I don’t have the balls to be a soldier, but he’s right. I’m a FUCKING PRETTY PRETTY PRINCESS!!!"
Q: What do you call an angry, bullied Asian kid?
Shoo Ting.
There were four people in a helicopter: Trump, a first-grade kid, a schoolteacher, and the Chinese leader.
There were only three parachutes. The Chinese leader takes one and jumps. The schoolteacher says she has to teach, so she jumps. Trump and the first-grader are left. Trump says, "I've lived my life; you take the last one." So the kid puts on his backpack and jumps. Trump makes it out safe.
What do you call a bunch of biracial, retarded kids? The Special Olympics.
What do you call a Down syndrome kid who has been physically abused by older teenagers and her parents for a total of 16 years and has red marks all over their body?
Not funny because Down syndrome jokes aren't funny ;)
Kidnapper: Hey kid, your mom told me to follow me.
Orphan: But I don't have a mom!
Why do emo kids not run? Because their bodies will tear apart from the bones from all the cuts.
Kid amogus backwards.
SUGOMA DIK!
Dora, where do we go next?
Kids at home: Area 51.
Meanwhile,
Dora: Let’s go deliver the evidence to President Biden.
1 day later,
Dora: WE DID IT, HOORAY!
Kid 1: "Fortnite is good and Brawl Stars sucks!"
Me: Wow, I didn't know you were dyslexic.
Me: Imagine not having hair.
Kids: On chemo.
Bitch the fuck.
I hate autistic kids and ADHD people because they are stupid, special, retarded, brainless freaks, and they are stupid.
What do you call a bunch of autistic kids in a box?
A toolbox.
What did the kid with cancer say? "Can-I see my mom one more time?"
Dark humor is like a kid with cancer. It never gets old.