Kids jokes

Kid

You can make fun of adopted kids all you want. What are they going to do, tell their parents on you? Lol.

Wife

Wife: I will leave you if you call me fat again.

Husband: Wait, dear... Don’t do it for the sake of our kid!

Wife: Kid?

Husband: Yeah, aren’t you pregnant?

School Shooter

VOTING SEMIFINAL 2

LIKE: When the school shooter throws a smoke grenade into the classroom and the autistic kid thinks it’s a Disco party. 🕺🕺🕺

DISLIKE: When you’re playing dead and the school shooter starts unbuckling his belt and you hear him say “This boy always had a fat ass”.

Vote for the better joke.

Opinion

No offense to anyone though. I don’t understand why everyone is bullying a person named Gwen?

My opinion is well “it’s just a regular person wanting to do jokes. You never know. It could be an adult or a kid.”

So leave her alone. Thank you. 😁

Memes

Kid

Why did the kid go in the guy's van?

Answer: He thought he was being adopted.

Nun

Three nuns went up to Mother Teresa and said, "Mother Teresa, we would not like to be nuns anymore." Mother Teresa said, "Okay, but first you have to do something unholy." So they leave and come back three days later. The first one says, "Mother Teresa, I did something unholy. I took a little kid's bike." Mother Teresa says, "Okay, drink from the holy water and you are free to go." The second nun walks up, upset, "I did something worse than her. I slept with a married man." The last nun walks up and says, "I did something worse than all of them." Mother Teresa says, "Oh god, oh gosh, what is it?" And the third nun says, "I peed in the holy water."

College

College is the opposite of kidnapping. They demand $100,000 from you, or they'll send your kid back.

Mama

Your mama is so fat that when she went to run in a yellow jumpsuit, the kids thought they missed the school bus.

Ball

Once I threw the ball at a wheelchair kid. Now we are playing Rocket League! :D

Baseball

Orphans and Chinese people can’t play baseball. The orphans can’t find home, and the Chinese kid will eat the bat.

Tit

Pussies and tits have one thing in common: they're both made for kids, but men end up licking or suckling them.

Emo

Yesterday I got detention because I said to the emo kid, "Come hang with us."