Kids jokes

When the school shooter starts doing Fortnite dances and the autistic kid joins in.

Teacher: What do you want when you grow up?

That depressed kid in class: Dead.

Kid: Mom, do trees poop?

Mom: Yes. That is how we get #2 pencils.

A teacher says, "What comes before 47?" Quiet kid: "AK!"

What was Stephen Hawking's favorite toy as a kid?

Hot Wheels.

You really can't call Stalin bad, just think about the kids that depression.

My teacher said, "Say welcome to our new student; he's an orphan." The teacher said, "Is anyone missing?" I said, "That kid's parents."

Why was Stephen Hawking a bad influence towards kids? Because he couldn’t stand for anything.

Fuck you, German kids, especially [those who are] alive.

What is yellow and brings kids to school every day?

What goes up but never past the digits 15?

A Make-A-Wish kid...

When a cat gets a sibling, do they say, "Oh, shit! Another mew kid?!?!?!"

Kid at school tells an orphan, "I fucked your mom."

Orphan: "What's a mom?"

What do you call a pool full of black kids? Baths bomb.

What do orphans eat for breakfast?

Daddy-O's.

What's the difference between boogers and broccoli?

Kids won't eat the broccoli.

How do you win an argument against an emo kid?

Give him a gun, he'll just shoot himself.

Kat, what? I did. A cat jump over the road because he believes he came flying in the clouds. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha hah hah hah hah hah hah hah hah hah hah hah hah hah hah hah hah hah hah hah hah! So funniest kitten kitten kitten kidding is my last time of Do you Joooooooooooooooooooooookin?

Teacher: What do you kids want to be when you grow up?

Kid 1: I want to be a firefighter.

Kid 2: I want to be a police officer.

Kid 3: I want to be dead like both my parents.

Teacher: Ok, everyone pull out your books.

Kid 4: Are we going to ignore what he said?

Teacher: What do you want me to do? Call his parents?

There was once a kid named Timmy. His father and mother went to bed one night and didn't hear or see Timmy come with them.

They all get under the covers. Timmy, still unnoticed, looks under the covers and lets out a blood-curdling scream. "MOMMY, WATCH OUT! THERE IS A SNAKE GOING INTO YOUR BIG BLACK HAIRY BUSH!" And he proceeds to say, "DON'T WORRY MOMMY, I'LL GET IT!" And he takes his father's penis in his mouth and chomps down.

Now I want you to think what their breakfast conversation was the next morning.