Kids jokes

Kidnapper: Hey kid, your parents told me to pick you up.

Kid: Sir, this is an orphanage.

Kidnapper: ...

I was at the orphan place, and I saw a kid crying. And I asked him where his parents are, and he fainted.

How does an emo kid compliment one another?

Like your cuts, G.

I was an orphan as a kid, but I have never had a bitch, so I asked this cheerleader to homecoming, and she said, "Mofo, you are only coming to hoco because you need a home to go to!"

What do blind kids and orphans have in common?

They both can't see their parents.

I went up to the blind kid and punched him and said bet you didn't see that coming

"Meow, meow, I'm a dog," said the sped kid.

A depressed kid didn't succeed at suicide and said, "I'm a failure at suicide, too."

I intern at an orphanage that burned down this weekend with 30 kids inside.

Thankfully, I don’t have to call and tell their parents.

There is a kid in my school who is exactly like Dahmer, but he doesn't eat ppl. Or does he...?

He's Dahmer's son @domink.

Walk up to the quiet kid and tell him to hang in there. Trust me, you won’t regret it.

I asked an emo kid if they were jealous because their phone died before them.

What do you call a kid with cancer? Limited.

What does an apple have in common with an emo kid?

Answer: They both hang.

The guy called up to the orphanage, then he asked, "Where are the kids' faces?"

Then another guy said, "Sorry, there's no homepage."

Hi, my name is Uncle Joe, and I like kids in a way that makes their parents not trust me anymore.

Can emo kids get a happy birthday?

I pushed a kid in a wheelchair into a fire.

Now we call him hot wheels.

What do you call a disabled kid on fire?

Hot wheels.

How do Chinese people name their kids?

They throw pots and pans down the stairs.