Kids jokes
I gave a blind kid a gun. I told him it was a hair dryer.
1 like = 1 kid in my oven. I'm trying to get followers and comments, please.
Yo, so poor that you wash your paper plates and cutlery in a kids' dishwasher.
What do you get when you mix birth control and LSD?
A trip without kids.
What do boobs and toys have in common?
They were both originally made for kids, but daddies end up playing with them.
Why is September 11th the best birthday ever? No one forgets it :)
Kid singing “abcd.”
Person says, “No, no, it’s obcd.”
Kid: *runs down the street* HELP ME!
Officer: You OK, kid?
Me: Don't worry! He's my nephew, there was a big spider.
Officer: Oh, OK, ma'am. *walks off*
When officer leaves:
Me: *gets whip* What did I say about leaving the basement?
Follow for candy, kids.
Like for pizza, kids.
Comment for kids.
+1 like = 1 kid in my basement.
+1 comment = 1 kid in my microwave.
+1 share = 1 kid in my blender.
+1 like = 1 kid in my basement.
+1 follower = 1 kid in my Microwave.
+1 Comet.
Why can’t two Asians make a white kid?
Because two wrongs don’t make a white.
I pushed a disabled kid into a fire and called him "hot wheels."
1 like = 1 kid in the bed with me.
Roses are red, I'm off the grid,
John Cena accidentally says "you can't see me" to a blind kid.
What keeps an emo kid from hitting the ground?
The rope.
When you forget the pinata at the birthday party. The kids: "Aww man." But the emo kid just hung himself. Kids: "Yaaaaayyy." Parents: "Adjust, improvise, overcome, that is the way."
What do Michael Jackson and a plastic bag have in common?
They both are plastic and like kids.
Dark humor is like cancer; it's funnier when kids get it.
What does an emo kid say when they wanna hang out?
"Wanna hang?"