Kid

Kid jokes

Class

If a special ed kid is late to class, is it okay to call me a little tardy?

Emo kid

Why couldn't the emo kid hang himself?

After eating through his feelings, the belt wouldn't fit around his neck.

Hearing Aid

I went to the store and I saw a kid with fake airpods, and I was going to tell him, "Nice fake airpods," but it was his hearing aids.

Jimmy Savile

I heard that Jimmy Savile never wanted to be famous... All he ever wanted was to settle down, and have kids.

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  • Dark Humor

    Kid: Mom, what's dark humor?

    Mom: Do you see that man without arms over there? Tell him to clap.

    Kid: But, mom, I'm blind!

    Mom: Exactly.

    Drug

    What's the difference between drugs and kids?

    I don't sell drugs.

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  • Wheelchair

    I bet a disabled kid on a wheelchair that if he could catch me, I'd give him 1000 dollars. He said deal, and I went upstairs.

    Pedo

    What does the SpongeBob intro and a pedo have in common?

    Are you ready, kids?🀣

    Michael Jackson

    What do Michael Jackson and the Captain from the Spongebob theme song have in common? They both say "are you ready kids?"

  • 5
  • Dark Humor

    My son asked me what dark humor was, so I told him, "see that kid in the wheelchair, ask him to stand." He said, "But Dad I'm blind." Exactly.

    Asian

    How do Asians name their kids?

    They throw pots and pans down the stairs. (ching chong dong)

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  • Michael Jackson

    What did they do with Michael Jackson when he died?

    He got so many plastic surgeries that they melted him down into legos and let kids play with him for a change.

    Present

    What did the kid without hands get for Christmas? - I don't know, he still didn't open his present...

    Depression

    What’s the difference between an apple and a depressed kid? The apple falls from the tree.

    Orphanage

    When you go to an orphanage for a field trip: When the workers said, "I remember you as a kid."

    Michael Jackson

    What do Michael Jackson and Santa Claus have in common?

    They both leave the little kids' room with empty sacks.

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