Joke jokes
What did the man say in the morning after beating up his wife?
"I woke up Chris Breezy."
How do you break up a fight between two gay men?
Say, "Can you get straight to the point?"
Ever since we started quarantining, I've only been telling inside jokes.
What do you call an autistic person playing a guitar?
Guarded.
Peter: *curses* Sam: Wow, do you kiss your mother with that mouth? Peter: Ha, joke’s on you! I don’t have a mother.
Tony, having a heart attack: ASFJDHJWNSGREGEJDHFWVWHUSYSG PETER, WE TALKED ABOUT THIS!!!!!!!!!!!!
One day, during lunch, a Spanish kid came up to my other friend and asked her questions in Spanish, and when she was about to say something, I popped out and said, “GO AWAY OR I WILL SUE YOU WITH BRIANNA’S SEVEN/7 LAWYERS!!!!(AKA, her seven/7 shoes.)”
A special quote: “No, Mackenzie! You're the savage beast!”
What do you call it when a man named Ned works at Panera Bread?
Panera Ned.
I'm on a roll with my jokes, right now!
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
I don't know, but the Twin Towers do.
Tried making 9/11 jokes, but none of it kept falling apart.
Your hairline lookin' like it got slapped up by Will Smith.
The first ever joke:
https://worstjokesever.com/jokes/52b8feb0514efb2cbf8ca375/what-is-the-second-hardest-thing-in-the-morning?
Why don't orphans get dad jokes?
Because they don't have a dad to tell them.
What did the farmer say to the doll?
You death baby doll.
How did "Bloody Mary" become a thing?
Because her husband beat her bloody when she didn't stay in the kitchen.
What do you call someone who makes a joke about Bread society?
The Doughker.
I'd make a joke about the chin bones, but y'all couldn't mandle it.
What do you call Mordecai dressing up as a basketball player?
Blue Jay Simpson!
I know this isn't an orphan joke, but I didn't know where to say it, so yeah.
I threw a nut at the allergy table and screamed, "YES, TRIPLE KILL!"
Yo hairline is so far back that it was there before the Big Bang happened.