There was a guy called Manners, one called Poo, and one called Shut Up.
One day, Manners was on his way to pick up Poo from school. A police officer stopped Shut Up and said:
Police: "What’s you name?"
Shut Up: "Shut Up."
Police: "Where's your manners?!"
Shut Up: "Picking up Poo."
The joke is u.
The son margarine shows his father his test that he failed.
Father: Son, you can do butter!
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Europe.
Europe who?
No, I'm not.
What is the difference between your new teacher and a train?
Your teacher says, "Spit out your gum," but a train says, "Choo Choo!"
Q. What sound does a sleeping T-Rex make?
A. A dino-snore.
What kind of shoes does a ninja wear? Sneakers.
Wanna hear a funny joke?
John's life.
What do you call a three-humped camel? Pregnant.
What is a fat boy's favorite karate move?
A pork chop.
What did Sally get for her birthday? A football!
Only joking; she hasn't opened the box yet.
Why can’t you tell a funny joke to a wheelchair kid? Because he just rolls with the joke.
I don't trust stairs. They're always up to something :D
Why do basketball players hate gravity?
Because it's always bringing them down.
Knock, knock!
Who's there?
Dad!
Dad who?
*Silence*
Teacher: What is the capital of Washington?
Dumb kid: The W???
Q: What's brown and sticky?
A: A stick :)
Someone asked me what the worst mistake you could make while being at work was, and I replied, "Being a doctor and mixing up the oral and rectal thermometers."
What would you call a person who hides in a house for 24 hours and then kills them?
Morgz.
I had a joke about pizza, it's just too cheesy.
