What do you call a pineapple in a pun?
A Puneapple.
Joke Jokes
I once made a belt out of clocks.
It was a waist of time.
What do you call a midget that waves? A microwave.
Why didn't the skeleton go to the ball? He didn't have any BODY to go with.
Why would a dead guy lie?
Because he can't stand up.
Why did the one-armed man cross the road?
To get to the second-hand shop.
Yo man, stand up.
*short person stands*
No, seriously man, stand up!
A Buddhist walks up to a hot dog stand and says, "Make me one with everything."
What do you do with a dead scientist?
You barium.
A child, molester, and priest walk into a bar.
He orders a drink.
How did the Emo kid bag all the cheerleaders?
He hit them all when he started shooting his shot.
What's the difference between a Palestinian and SpongeBob's Sandy Cheeks?
One is living in a bubble, the other one in rubble.
Fat person: "Hey, what's up?"
Friend: "Your blood pressure!"
What's the difference between a chickpea and a lentil?
I've never had a lentil on my face.
What did I say to the bridge?
Bye, bridge.
Q: Why did the orphan cross the road?
A: To get to the other side to find his parents.
There was no other side of the road.
I have a joke about paper. It's tearable.
Chuck Norris has a grizzly bear carpet in his room. It's not dead, just afraid to move.
Why can't you tell an Indian a secret? Because the red dot means they're recording!
What's the difference between a rubber and Michael Jackson? Nothing, kids touch them both.
