Joke jokes
What does a woman’s pussy and a chainsaw have in common?
Miss by a few inches and you’re in deep shit.
Why was 10 afraid?
Because he was in the middle of 9/11.
What's similar between a pregnant 14 year old and the fetus inside of her? They are both thinking, "Oh shit, my mom's gonna kill me."
(sorry in advance this joke is brutal)
What has 12 heads and 24 eyes?
The bin at the back of the abortion clinic.
Have you ever heard of emo pizza?
It cuts itself!
Sike, I lied, your Minecraft account is mine!
What do you get when you cross an elephant and a rhino?
Answer: Elephino.
Why can't orphans have a large bag of crisps?
Because it's family size! 😂
Why was Jesus Christ cut from the hockey team?
He kept getting nailed to the boards.
Me: Man, I wish my clothes were emo.
Friend: Why?
Me: So they would hang themselves.
What do 3-year-old boys say after going to confession?
"My bum hurts!"
Why did Sally stare out the window for 24 hours straight?
Sally's used to being blind!
Okay not a depression joke but... what’s worse than 10 babies in 1 bucket?
1 baby in 10 buckets.
Why is it illegal to do reverse cowgirl in Alabama? You never turn your back to your family.
Oh, my fat joke offended you? Which one of your chins did I hurt?
What does a perverted frog say? Rub it.
Why don't witches wear underwear? To get a better grip on their broom.
What do girls and rocks have in common? The flat ones get skipped.
What is red and goes 200 mph? A baby in a blender.
Why did the cow have for breakfast?
Answer: Muesli.
Someone asked me why I'm still here... the answer is simple: I don't want to be used as a school assembly.
My friend was on a wheelchair... he committed suicide yesterday. I remember when I met him last time, he told us a good joke and I appreciated him and told him to become a stand-up comedian.
What do Nelson Mandela and Paul Walker have in common?
They both died at 95.