What's the Twin Towers' most favorite band? Al Qaedirection.
Joke Jokes
"Dog the dog" and Maggie were frightened of her, and the kangaroo said that she had to be in a hospital with a doctor. Jokes and Maggie were walking. I was going to go off the road to the city hall to see her, and I said that the only one-piece dress for women readymade RB collection, as he was walking in the city, and Maggie was a little bit more on the side of it.
What do you call a traffic light that tells you, "Don't look, I am changing!"
What happens when Helen Keller picks her nose?
She slurs her words...
Q: How do you see a bad joke?
A: Look in the mirror.
Why can’t orphans have milk?
Because their dad never came back.
What’s one store an orphan can’t shop at?
HomeGoods ;)
What’s the difference between a kid with cancer and a dark humor joke?
They never get old.
Why did the Orphan punch the other orphan?
Because the orphan broke his leg then had to get a retirement fund, so then he farted and got 1m dollars in cash, so then he started eating his toe jam and thought it tasted really good, so he started selling it to Taco Bell, then ate a cow. All the sudden he was attacked by hangry aliens then gave them some toe jam. They loved it, so they farted there way back up to space where they were eating Harold's fresh toe jam. It was so good, then one of the aliens ate there dog, so had to go the dollar tree to get it out then started gagging on one of the aliens' 2 meter defeater, and then the Orphan made out with the other Orphan and had a wedding at playground sharting happily ever after.
What do you call a special ed class that’s flooded?
Vegetable soup.
Q. What did the math book say to the other math book?
A. I have too many problems.
What is the best whey to make friends with an American boy, you bunch?
What do you call an orphan who grows up and becomes a priest?
Father Les.
What 7 letters do you say when you open the fridge and see it’s empty?
O I C U R M T
Lol, I have no life :)
Ahem... if somebody you don't like, or somebody random just calls you in general,
answer the phone with this:
"Hello, thank you for choosing Mama's Pizzeria/Abortion Clinic, your loss is our sauce, how may I help you?"
or
"Hello, this is David's Orphanage, you make them, we take them, how may I help you?"
Some people's reactions are priceless, and then they wonder about your mental health.
Women are like marshmallows because they are white, squashy, and we put our sticks inside you.
The F in "I'm orphan" stands for family.
But there is no F.
Me, trying to interact with people: “Hey, are you a rope? Because I really wanna HANG with you.”
Person I’m talking to: *Pulling out phone to call suicide hotline* “haha what.”
Hey, wanna hear a joke?
My life :(
