Joke jokes
Dark humour jokes are like water; some get it, some don’t.
I would've made a joke about Alzheimer's, too bad I forgot about it...
My teacher got so mad at me for making 9/11 jokes, she hit me twice and I said, "Damn, got hit twice!"
Why was 6 scared of 7?
'Cause 7 8 9.
What did the fish say when he swam into a wall?
Nothing, because fish can't talk.
Me: Knock knock.
My Grandma: Who’s there?
Me: Interrupting cow.
My Grandma: Interrupting c-
[Dies from heart attack]
These 9/11 jokes just don’t land.
Why did an old man fall in a well? Because he couldn’t see that well!
Why did the actor fall through the floorboards? They were going through a stage!
Why did a scarecrow win a Nobel prize? He was outstanding in his field!
Why are peppers the best at archery? Because they habanero!
What did the duck say after she bought chapstick? Put it on my bill!
What do you call a fake noodle? An impasta!
What did the three-legged dog say when he walked into a saloon? “I’m looking for the man who shot my paw!”
How do you tell the difference between a bull and a cow? It is either one or the udder!
What’s red and smells like blue paint? Red paint!
What’s the difference between a hippo and a Zippo? One is very heavy, the other is a little lighter!
What do the Twin Towers and a bad joke have in common? They never land well.
A friend took me out to his shed and was showing me all his tools, when he pointed to a ladder. "That's my step ladder," he said. "I never knew my real ladder."
I pushed the kid in a wheelchair into fire... I called him "HOT WHEELS".
All of the people disliking this category are probably emo.
Guys, stop making funny jokes of orphans. What, their parents are gonna get mad? Oh wait, continue.
What do you call somebody in America that is smart?
An immigrant.
So, my girlfriend left me. I took her wheelchair, and she came back crawling.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
A dragon.
A dragon who?
The dragon gonna drag its balls across your face.
Why is the blind kid popular?
He can't see the middle fingers.
I told this man to rev his vehicle.
Didn't know wheelchairs can't rev.
What does a blind man crying and an unplugged TV have in common?
Nothing can be seen when they get turned on.
Why does a blind man still have eyes?
So he can see that he can't see.