What's big, green, has four legs, and if it falls out of a tree, it can kill you?
A pool table.
What's big, green, has four legs, and if it falls out of a tree, it can kill you?
A pool table.
What's the difference between a silver medal and a priest?
They both came in a little behind.
What do gay horses eat?
Hay.
What car does Hitler drive?
A Fuhrerri.
The past, present, and future walk into a bar.
It gets really tense.
What do Colorado and Saudi Arabia have in common?
It's legal to get stoned.
What do you call a drunken Muslim?
Mohammered.
What do you call a fish with no eye?
Fsh.
What did one fish say to the other?
Keep your mouth shut and you'll never get caught.
"What do we want?"
"HEARING AIDS!"
"When do we want them?"
"HEARING AIDS!"
So a blind man walks into a bar.
At least he thinks so.
What did the leper say to the prostitute?
Keep the tip.
How do you make holy water?
You boil the hell out of it.
Just because she weighed as much as two women... Doesn't mean you had a threesome.
Why don't Amish people water ski?
Because their horses would drown.