Joke jokes
Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.
Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Sally.
Look at your left hand, now look at your right hand, and tell yourself, "Which hand do you cheat with?"
Wanking.
If you want a joke, look at yourself in the mirror!
What's a similarity between your best friend and a tree?
They both fall over when you hit them with an axe.
How many babies does it take to paint a wall red?
It depends on how hard you throw them.
It said to submit a joke, and that's what my mom did when I was born.
"I asked my friend what his height is?" He answered, "I'm sans'sational!"
A nun walked into a bar with her clothes on inside out. The bartender asked her about it, and she replied, "It's a bad habit."
Monkey: What ya doing?
Other monkey: Just you know, "hanging around."
Bad joke, right? I just can't think of something amazing. It's like my brain is "hanging."
Yesterday I asked my friend, "What is a fish without eyes?"
They replied, "I don’t know."
I said, "Fsh."
Knock knock.
Who’s there?
Who.
Who who.
You sound like an owl.
What's the difference between all the jokes on this page? Nothing, they're all knockoffs of old jokes you've already heard that aren't funny. Penis!
Why didn’t Stephen Hawking go to heaven? Because it’s a staircase, not a ramp.
When the chair was invented, the inventor's friend wanted to know what it did. The inventor replied: "You might want to sit down for this."
What’s the difference between a dumpster full of dead babies and a Lamborghini?
I don’t have a Lamborghini in my garage.
What do you call a man with no body and no nose?
No Body Knows.
No body nose.
What do you call a man with no body and no nose?
Nobody knows. No body, nose.
What do you call a cool octopus?
Tenta-cool (tentacle)
What is the difference between a frog and a horny toad?
One says “Ribbit, Ribbit” and the other says “Rub it, Rub it”.
What's worse than a baby in a trash can?
A trash can in a baby.