Job jokes
My career is worth more than your adoption.
I saw a girl crying. I asked her where her parents were, and she started to cry even more.
Man, I love working in the orphanage.
I work on medicine; my job is to smell it to see if it's bad :)
I saw a little girl crying, and I said, "Where are your parents?" That day, I got fired from the orphanage. 🤪
My sister told me she liked Medusa.
I said, "Huh?"
My sister said my blow jobs are so good she looks up at the guy's facial expression, and when they look down, they do nothing but stay still.
People always talk about starting families, what happened to finishing the job?
So a kid was crying... I asked him what was wrong.
I LOVE WORKING AT AN ORPHANAGE!
A hand job from a deaf person counts as oral.
How it be when the new guy takes too long...
Hay Danny, it's me Johnny.
Johnny: Boss says to kill the guy in red. Point the gun at his head.
Danny: Ok, target locked. 3... 2... 1... bang.
Johnny: Danny, hope you did not get the man in red.
Danny: OH MY BRO FOR REALL.
I have a better version of this joke.
How to make a plumber cry: Simple, kill his family. That’ll definitely turn on the waterworks.
When I saw your hairline, I thought you worked at McDonald’s.
What's another place orphans can't work at besides SC Johnson?
The Home Depot.
What a day yesterday was! I got a promotion, and my sister's killer was hit by a bus. Now I'm in a cast!
Why was the duck fired from the train station?
He was a bad conducktor!
I had a new "blonde parts expert" woman call for parts. I needed 2 ought wire for a job. She calls NAPA auto and asks for twat wire. The parts guy was assuming she didn't know about Planned Parenthood? .. 😂🤣
Today was no fun. A rhino escaped from the zoo and ate two parents, and I lost my job as zookeeper.
I got hired to work as a camp counselor for kids with ADHD, but I got fired. I guess I shouldn't have introduced myself with "Welcome to concentration camp".
I was at work and then a little kid came up to me and she said, "What happened to all the parents?" She sounded so confused, so I told her, "It's only yours, kid, they left you on purpose." She cried. I felt bad for a second and thought, oh well, time to get back to my job at the orphanage.
What's the difference between a businessman and a businesswoman? Wo!
Some moving men had just begun their day's work.
The first thing they brought into the house was a huge couch.
The owner came in and asked how everything was going. They replied, "Sofa so good."