Job jokes
💔 The Broken Family 💔 . Part 1
Girl: Mom, dad tried to have sex with me last night.
Mom: Are you serious?? (Shocked)
Girl: Yah. He said I must kiss him after he didn't want to let me go.
Mom: Am gonna kill ur dad (Angry)
Girl: Please mom, we still need him, who will buy use food and clothes. You don't have a job mom.
Mom: But what he did was wrong.
Girl: I know.
(SOUND OF A CAR COMING IN)
Mom: Is that ur dad.
Girl: Yes Mom
Comment Part 2
Two Native Americans
Unwittingly walk into a gay bar and sit down to order a pitcher of beer. As they're sitting there sucking back on their ale, a gay guy walks up and says, "How would you boys like a blow job?"
The one Indian stands up and decks the guy, knocking him unconscious. He then sits back down and finishes his beer.
His buddy looks over and says, "Hey Joe, what did you do that for?"
Joe replies, "Not sure but it was something about getting a job!"
The man fired from the World Trade Center on September 10.
That is just plain wrong.
I work on medicine; my job is to smell it to see if it's bad :)
Why'd Biden get fired from the supermarket?
He kept telling little kids they smell like freshly baked bread.
Memes
As a doctor myself, that nurse was very slow, she tested my patience!
I saw a girl crying. I asked her where her parents were, and she started to cry even more.
Man, I love working in the orphanage.
I like sucking the Twin Towers off, but then I forgot dad already finished the job.
My career is worth more than your adoption.
What's another place orphans can't work at besides SC Johnson?
The Home Depot.
Why was the duck fired from the train station?
He was a bad conducktor!
I saw a little girl crying, and I said, "Where are your parents?" That day, I got fired from the orphanage. 🤪
Little boy: Momma?
Mom: Yes, my dear.
Little boy: One day I wanna work in McDonald's.
Mom: Why!?
Little boy: Just to see if their ice cream machine is actually broken.
People always talk about starting families, what happened to finishing the job?
So a kid was crying... I asked him what was wrong.
I LOVE WORKING AT AN ORPHANAGE!
How it be when the new guy takes too long...
Hay Danny, it's me Johnny.
Johnny: Boss says to kill the guy in red. Point the gun at his head.
Danny: Ok, target locked. 3... 2... 1... bang.
Johnny: Danny, hope you did not get the man in red.
Danny: OH MY BRO FOR REALL.
What a day yesterday was! I got a promotion, and my sister's killer was hit by a bus. Now I'm in a cast!
A hand job from a deaf person counts as oral.
My sister told me she liked Medusa.
I said, "Huh?"
My sister said my blow jobs are so good she looks up at the guy's facial expression, and when they look down, they do nothing but stay still.
When I saw your hairline, I thought you worked at McDonald’s.