Jealous

Jealous jokes

Phone

Sometimes I get jealous when my phone dies.

Why? You ask.

Because it only takes one charge to bring it back to life.

Phone

Sometimes I get jealous when my phone dies. (This does not apply to me. It's a joke.)

Mom

I’d pound your mom so fast, even Sonic would get jealous!

Ass

Is your ass jealous of the shit that came out of your fucking mouth?

Michael Jackson

Michael Jackson

A little boy enters Michael Joseph Jackson's house with a doll, and Michael looks angrily at the boy. But the little boy says something that makes Michael jealous: "The girl is mine." Michael cries and asks the boy to leave. A child is saved, and more are, thanks to Conrad Murray and June 25th, dead pedophile day.

Son

Son: Mom, is it possible to make a strawberry cake for me?

Mom: No, that's impossible.

Son: But it is possible for your secret boyfriend, right?

Mom: No, no, please don't tell your dad. I will make a strawberry cake for you.

Son: Daddy has already tasted your sweet strawberry cake, so because of that, I felt jealous ^_^

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  • Orphan

    Why were the students jealous of the orphan?

    He never had any homework!

    (I'm going to hell for this)