Jealous jokes
I get jealous when my phone dies.
Sometimes I get jealous when my phone dies. (This does not apply to me. It's a joke.)
You're so full of shit that the toilet's jealous.
I’d pound your mom so fast, even Sonic would get jealous!
I bet the emo kids are jealous when they go to a funeral.
Why are emos jealous of light?
The lights are hanging.
Q: Why did the emo kid get jealous on Xmas?
A: He saw the ornaments hanging.
The man was dangling by a string!
I was jealous the day he died.
Is your ass jealous of the shit that came out of your fucking mouth?
I'm so jealous of babies with anencephaly.
They can eat all the ice cream they want and never get brain freezes.
Why was the emo jealous of the orange?
It came precut.
The emo girl got jealous that her phone died and not her.
Your hairline is so far back, it makes the Giant from Clash of Clans jealous!
When does an emo get jealous at a phone?
When it dies.
Is your ass jealous of the amount of shit that always comes out of your mouth?
Why are Elmo’s jealous of lights?
Lights are hanging.
Son: Mom, is it possible to make a strawberry cake for me?
Mom: No, that's impossible.
Son: But it is possible for your secret boyfriend, right?
Mom: No, no, please don't tell your dad. I will make a strawberry cake for you.
Son: Daddy has already tasted your sweet strawberry cake, so because of that, I felt jealous ^_^
Why is Delta jealous?
Because Omicron took the final kill.
I bet emo girls get jealous when people cut paper.
Why were the students jealous of the orphan?
He never had any homework!
(I'm going to hell for this)