Jealous jokes
Why are emos jealous of light?
The lights are hanging.
I bet the emo kids are jealous when they go to a funeral.
Sometimes I get jealous when my phone dies.
Why? You ask.
Because it only takes one charge to bring it back to life.
Sometimes I get jealous when my phone dies. (This does not apply to me. It's a joke.)
I get jealous when my phone dies.
You're so full of shit that the toilet's jealous.
I'm so jealous of babies with anencephaly.
They can eat all the ice cream they want and never get brain freezes.
Q: Why did the emo kid get jealous on Xmas?
A: He saw the ornaments hanging.
The man was dangling by a string!
I was jealous the day he died.
Is your ass jealous of the shit that came out of your fucking mouth?
Is your ass jealous of the amount of shit that always comes out of your mouth?
Your hairline is so far back, it makes the Giant from Clash of Clans jealous!
Why are Elmo’s jealous of lights?
Lights are hanging.
The emo girl got jealous that her phone died and not her.
Why was the emo jealous of the orange?
It came precut.
When does an emo get jealous at a phone?
When it dies.
Son: Mom, is it possible to make a strawberry cake for me?
Mom: No, that's impossible.
Son: But it is possible for your secret boyfriend, right?
Mom: No, no, please don't tell your dad. I will make a strawberry cake for you.
Son: Daddy has already tasted your sweet strawberry cake, so because of that, I felt jealous ^_^
Trump cut funding for Sesame Street.
I think he's jealous that the characters on Sesame Street can count to 10.
I bet emo girls get jealous when people cut paper.
Why is Delta jealous?
Because Omicron took the final kill.