it's jokes

Once there were these two fruitcakes driving in their Pink Porsche. "Oh, this handles so well!" they exclaimed.

Then this Mack truck came around the corner at their stop sign and rear-ended them. The passenger said to his partner, "You tell that man he's gonna pay every single cent 'cause we're going to sue him!"

So the flamer gets out and swishes to tell the trucker to do that very thing. The trucker was a tough who said, "What do you want, wimp?" The gay said, "You just hit our new Pink Porsche, and we're gonna make you pay every single cent 'cause we're gonna sue you!"

The trucker said, "Oh yeah? Blow me!" The gay driver went "Ohhh!" and ran back. The gay partner asked him, "What did he say?" His fruitcake driver said, "Ohhh! It's wonderful, he wants to settle out of court!"

Bee Jokes:

"Hello."

"Oh, hello, Buzzy!"

"Why are ya calling me Buzzy this whole time?"

"Because you BEE BUZZing!" (Laughs)

"It's not funny! Jokes are the worst, although I hate those Bee Jokes!"

"Chillax bro. Don't BEE a hater of jokes, dude!" (Laughs)

"Aagh! You always had a choice, but I will sting ya face!"

"No! You BEE like pollen to make HONEY-moon." (Laughs)

"Stoooop!! I'm outta here, your worst fan."

"Fan?"

"Yes, your worst fan!"

"No! Fan!"

"What?! Aaaaaauuuuggghhhh!!!"

"Ohhh! Buzzy's looking BEE-wind!" (Laughs)

A robot walks into a bar and orders a martini.

The bartender is flabbergasted that a robot can do that.

"New around here?" said the bartender.

"Nah, been here a while," said the robot.

Bartender "You can talk?"

Robot "Yeah, pretty cool, huh."

Bartender "Why do you want a martini?"

Robot "Oh, I'm just in the mood for one, you know?"

The bartender is shocked to see a robot making completely normal small talk.

The robot seems to be just like a normal human.

"Wow, who programmed you?" asked the bartender.

"The top minds in the world," said the robot.

The robot speaks again, "I have a question for you..."

Bartender, "What?"

"Why did you read this entire story? It does not have a punchline. I just wasted your time. Get bamboozled, nerd!"

Why are there adoption centers? Because it's a market for pedophiles.

Yo mama so fat, I took a picture of her last year, and it is still printing.

She blew on it, and it went hard.

I gave up hope and I liked it!!

I take meds to feel fantastic! (I kissed a boy{but fed up lyrics})

How do you find a blind man on a nude beach?

It’s not hard.

I heard he's doing a revival tour next month. It's called "Stephen Hawking Unplugged."

What did the car say when it crashed? That's wheely unfortunate!

What does a grape do if a rhino is about to squash it?

Nothing, it just lets out a little wine.

I would tell you a joke about a clock, but it’s a waste of time! 😄😄

I caught my sister licking up and down and deep throating a banana. I said, "Why are you doing that for?" She replied, "I'm doing it for practice for your friends."

How many babies does it take to replace a light bulb? I'm guessing more than 10 cause it's still dark in my basement.

Have I told you the joke about the airplane? Ah, forget it, it probably just went over your head.

I didn’t know if she was anorexic or not, so I tossed her an onion ring to see if she would eat it or use it as a hula hoop.

How did Caillou quit his party?

He had to cancel it.

I bet most of these mfs are white or not Mexican, lmao. Y'all really going at it with these jokes 😐

Your hairline's so far back that Dora the Explorer can't explore it!

How many tickles does it take to make an octopus laugh?

Ten tickles.