it's jokes
Yo life got no meaning, just like your dad when he left. Like if it's a good one.
What is the difference between a nun and a hooker?
One makes you believe in Heaven, the other makes you feel it.
Yo mama so fat, when she went on the weighing scale, it said, "To be continued."
You know why I have so low IQ? It's because the left side of my brain gets nothing right, and the right side of my brain has nothing left.
How do you stop a baby from crying?
You drown it.
How do you stop a bull from charging? Cancel its credit card.
Why is 10 scared?
Because it is in the huddle of 9/11.
My penis was in the Guinness Book of World Records. -- Then the librarian told me to take it out.
If you spin a fidget spinner, You'll end up spinning it too fast. When you end up spinning it too fast, it will make you fly away. When you fly away, you'll end up in a tree. When you end up in a tree, you'll see that your friends are hanging out without you. When you see that your friends are hanging out without you, you'll run away in the woods because you're sad. When you ran away in the woods, you'll see a bear. When you see a bear, it will chase you. When the bear chases you, you'll build a fort to protect yourself. When you build a fort to protect yourself, you then notice you're lonely. You'll become friends with the bear. When you become friends with a bear, you'll start to act like a bear. When you start to act like a bear, you will become a bear.
DO NOT BECOME A BEAR! NEVER PLAY WITH A FIDGET SPINNER!
Why can’t you ever trick an aborted baby?
Because it wasn’t born yesterday. 🤭
I was going to tell a time traveling joke, but you guys didn't like it.
How many police officers does it take to screw in a light bulb?
None, they just beat the room for it being black.
Why do orphans not like July 24th??
Because it's Parents Day.
Johnny Johnny?
Yes pa pa.
Eating sugar?
Yes pa pa, I am eating sugar because it is the only thing I can reach and you have refused to feed me for the past 3 days. You smoke 2 packs of cigs a day and you're mad at me for eating a little sugar. Smoking? Telling lies? Yes pa pa, you do all of those things because you're a chronic addict.
Did you hear about the guy who got hit in the head with a can of soda? At least it was a soft drink.
It's supposed to say "goes," not "goes."
Your forehead is so big that it could carry the passengers of the Titanic.
Why can't orphans never run all the bases in baseball? Because they can never make it home.
Who’s stronger in a relationship, a man or a woman? A woman, because it takes six men to carry him to his grave; it only takes one woman to put him there.
When someone asks you why you went bald, say it wasn't a choice. It just happened.