it's jokes
If your house is cold, just stand in the corner. It's always 90 degrees there.
What’s 9 inches long and makes my girlfriend scream?
One inch and put it in her. Her miscarriage.
There are 4 billion women on earth. Why isn't it clean yet?
What’s the difference between jelly and jam?
You can’t “jelly” it in her ass.
How many emo kids does it take to change a lightbulb?
None, they just like hanging in the dark.
Did Walmart take the Juneteenth ice cream off the shelf?
It was only 3/5 full.
I saw my sisters masturbating with cucumbers and hotdogs.
I said, "Come on, I was gonna eat that later! Now it's just gonna taste like hotdogs and cucumbers!"
You’ve got something on your face. Wait, no, it’s just missing something. My dick.
They say I have a silver tongue, I'll let you make it white.
Today I'm attaching a light to the ceiling, but I'm afraid I'll probably screw it up.
Q. What's the difference between pizza and an emo?
A. The pizza doesn't cut itself.
If a mentally challenged person shows up late,
Is it ok to call him tardy?
What's the difference between a casino and a church?
You actually mean it when you pray at a casino.
What's the easiest way to make a glow worm happy? Cut off its tail—it'll be delighted!
If all women disappeared one day, it would be a pain in the ass.
Son asks dad, "How much does marriage cost?"
Dad: "I don’t know, son. I’m still paying for it."
How do you make the grass cut itself?
Make it depressed.
As the Navy SEALs burst into Osama Bin Laden's room in his Pakistani compound, his last dying words forever rang in the ears of the SEALs...
"It was just a prank bro."
What do you call it when Panera Bread commits genocide?
Panera bloodshed.
What do you call it when someone lies to Panera Bread?
Panera misled.