it's jokes
If something doesn't make sense to an Eskimo... is it counterINUITive?
Have you ever tried sex when camping?
It's f***ing intense.
Why was the computer late to work?
Because it had a hard drive!
How do you make an octopus laugh?
You give it ten tickles.
The past, the present, and the future walk into a bar.
It was tense.
How does a prostitute make more than a drug dealer?
Because she can clean her crack and sell it again.
What happened to the fly on the toilet seat?
It got pissed off.
Why does a giraffe need such a long neck?
Because its head is so far away from its body.
What did the boy with no hands get for his birthday?
I don't know. He hasn't opened it yet.
What is easier to pick up the heavier it gets?
Women.
What do you call it when you're trying to find out what someone had for lunch?
An ingestigation.
How many dead prostitutes does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
More than three because the basement is still dark!
How do you make holy water?
You take normal water and boil the hell out of it.
What's the difference between roast beef and pea soup?
It's easy to roast beef.
What do you call a fruit that argues against the position it supports?
The Devil's advocado.
What do you call it when a chameleon won't change colors?
A reptile dysfunction.
Did you hear about the clam that could play violin?
It had excellent mussel memory.
Did you hear that Daft Punk came out with a cook book?
It's called "One More Thyme."
How many Mexicans does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Just Juan.
What's big, green, has four legs, and if it falls out of a tree, it can kill you?
A pool table.