it's jokes
I was going to make a chemistry joke. But it looks like I won’t get a reaction :)
What is the difference between acne and a priest?
Acne waits for a boy to turn twelve before it comes on his face.
Everyone's always saying they're so worried about America's big button, the one that controls all the nuclear power. I'm not worried about that... I'm worried about the idiot on the end of it.
Three men are traveling through the desert when their single camel dies. They walk for a while, but then it becomes night. Desperate for shelter, they suddenly stumble across a tent, and inside are three beautiful women. The men were not only lost but horny, too, so they begin to have sex with the women. But the tent belongs to a prince, and these three women were his wives, so he is very angry when he arrives an hour later and sees three strangers having sex with his wives. He tells the three men he will chop off their penises as punishment, in some way relating to their job. He asks the first man what his job is:
The guy says, "I'm a fireman."
The prince says, "Then we'll burn your dick off!"
The second guy says, "I'm an employee at the shooting range."
The prince says, "Then we'll shoot your dick off!"
The third guy smiles and says, "I'm a lollipop salesman."
Why did Hitler get hit by a baseball? Because he did nazi it coming!
Stephen Hawking had pins and needles and got told to walk it off.
I love it when cancer hits like a ton of bricks. The best part is when it kills people.
You want to hear a joke about pizza?
Sorry! Can't tell ya, it's too cheesy!
Why is it poetic when they have plenty of those German sandals in the store? Because they're Birkenstock.
Why did Aaron slit his wrists?
Because it's him.
Aaron and Ben meet on Grindr. They have a drink and have sex. They wake up in the morning in bed. Aaron says, "I'm so glad I got it out." Ben replies, "What? Oh, just the HIV."
I lost my virginity once and found it in a store being sold off.
Did you know that there is a new drug on the market for lesbians who are suffering from depression? It's called Trycoxagain.
What's the difference between a dead baby in a dumpster and a treasure chest? It's a surprise when you find the treasure.
Knock knock.
Boo.
No need to cry, it was only a joke. Yeh, I can't think of anything.
Q: What's the best way to eat a squirrel?
A: Open up its little legs.
How many Germans does it take to change a light bulb? Nine.
I have a fear of speed bumps. But I am slowly getting over it.
Astronomers got tired of watching the moon rotate around the earth for 24 hours, so they just called it a "day".
Your mama so fat, when she stepped on the scale, it said, "One at a time."