it's jokes
God creating spiders.
God: "Make it have 8 legs." Angel: "Ok? Bit excessive but ok." God: "And 8 eyes." Angel: "You need to calm down and li-" God: "Give it a butt rope!"
Hey, look, it's Bai! (insert the picture of a Bai drink)
Why did the tomato go red? Because it saw the salad dressing!
What happened to the egg after it went on the rollercoaster?
It was scrambled.
A man walking on his roof, carrying an axe. He drops it on someone below him and says, "Sorry, it was an axe-cident!"
A son walks up to his dad and says, "Dad! I just had sex for the first time."
The dad goes, "Great! Wanna sit down and talk about it?"
The son says, "I can't sit right now, my butt is very sore."
My brother once froze a dollar in a block of ice. I called it "cold hard cash."
A panda walks into a bar. He asked the bartender for a sandwich and then proceeds to shoot him, then leaves the bar. Later on, after asking witnesses, the police track down the panda and take him to the station. They question him and ask, “Why’d you do it?” The panda replied, “It’s what pandas do, look it up.” So they did, they went on Wikipedia, and there it was: Pandas eat shoots and leaves.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Boo.
Boo who?
Don't cry, it's just a joke!
Actually, it isn't a bear joke, but bear with me here...
What would you call the Eiffel Tower if it falls over? The I Fell Tower!
A Nacho has a problem going on, and the Taco says to the Nacho, "Wanna taco 'bout it?"
And the Nacho says to the Taco, "It's nacho problem!"
I heard every single machine in the coin factory just broke down all of a sudden.
It just doesn’t make any cents!
I wanted to make a belt out of watches, then I realized it was a waste of time!
Life as an elevator has its ups and downs.
Knock knock. "Who's there?" "Grandma." "Oh, okay."
Nah, it's a penis.
I bought a wooden whistle. But it wouldn't whistle, so I bought a steel whistle. But it still wouldn't whistle. So I bought a lead whistle, but it still wouldn't lead me to whistle.
Why didn't the toilet paper cross the road? It got stuck in a crack!
Stephen Hawking's family was cruel. He fell over and got told to man up and walk it off.
Losing weight is a piece of cake. Just don't pick it up.