it's jokes

Dog

    • A family had a very disobedient dog. It would bite the children’s hands when they pet the animal, the dog would piss on everything, and it would chew their shoes. This is why it was adopted.

    Hand

    • I say hi to Sans. Sans shows his hand and says, "It's hand to meet you," and we both laugh.

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    • Exit

    • I needed to take a phone call, so I went to the nearest exit. I guess you can say it was very exciting! 😂

    TV

    • Hi guys, I am so happy and proud of myself and I thought I should share with you! Today I saw myself on TV when I turned it off.

    Contest

    • I caught my mom licking up and down and deep throating a banana. I said, "Why are you doing that?" She replied, "I’m doing it for practice for who could suck the best dick contest in the neighborhood."

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    • Alien

    • An alien walks into a bar. There is a guy sitting next to him, and the alien touches his shoulder.

    The man says, "Do that one more time and I'll run you over." The alien does it again and gets ran over. They get back in the bar and he touches him again. The man says, "Do that again and I'll chop your dick off." He touches him again. The man pulls the alien's pants down and pulls out his knife. He was astonished at what he found. There was nothing there! He looks up at the alien and looks at his finger and fainted.

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    • Glock

    • When you're sitting in class and the quiet kid yells, "Lovely day, isn't it?" ... and you see a Glock shape in his pocket.

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    • Abortion

    • A guy tells his pal, "My wife is expecting. We're going to the clinic to see if it's a girl or a boy."

    "Congrats, man. What are you gonna name it if it's a boy?"

    "We're going with Trevor."

    "Ok, what if it's a girl?"

    "Then we'll have an abortion."

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    • People

    • What does a deaf person do when they hear people scream? I don't know; it's not like they're gonna hear it anyway.