IT jokes
Which tower is better at playing catch? The south tower, obviously. It caught 2!
What does a nosey pepper do?
It gets jalapeño business!
What happens when you have dry elbows at work?
You don't have any elbow grease to put into it.
When I see two lovers' names on a tree, I don’t find it cute or funny. I think, why would they be bringing a knife on a date?
Why can't the orphan play baseball?
It doesn't know where home is.
At a party, a young wife admonished her husband, "That's the fourth time you've gone back for ice cream and cake. Doesn't it embarrass you?"
"Why should it?" answered her spouse. "I keep telling them it's for you."
I made a website about orphans, but it doesn't have a home page.
Why do orphans only have iPhone 10+?
Because it doesn't have a home button.
Doesn't having depersonalization mean that you're like the animatronics off of FNAF/Five Nights at Freddy's?
(If you don't know what depersonalization is, look it up.)
War isn't about who's right. It's about who's left.
Why does an orphan's year only have 363 days? Because it's missing Mother's and Father's Day.
Me: I know a good 9/11 joke, but it would probably go over your head.
The Twin Towers: No, it won’t.
The nut is so solid, it’s peanut brittle.
I keep hearing "Obesity kills."
My only question is "Why is it taking so long?"
Yo Mama is so dumb, she stares at a juice carton for an eternity because it says "Concentrate" on the box.
It's past April Fool's Day, and we still have a joke as president.
What’s an orphan’s favorite phone? An iPhone 14 'cause it doesn’t have a home button.
Why are orphans unable to work at S.C. Johnson?
Because it’s a family business.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Pencil.
Pencil who?
Oh, never mind, it's pointless.
Me: Knock knock.
Friend: Who's there?
Me: A broken pencil.
Friend: A broken pencil who?
Me: Nevermind, it's pointless.