Insult jokes

You're so ugly that everytime you look up in the sky, God says, "Sorry, can't help you."

Your mama is so ugly that her birth certificate is an apology letter from the condom company.

Yo mama so dumb, she thought a quarterback was a refund.

What is a retard's favorite race? The grand autismo.

WARNING OFFENSIVE: What is the difference between a redhead and a brick? ... A brick gets laid.

Yo mama is so ugly, her portraits hang themselves.

Yo mama so dumb, she sold her car for gas money.

Yo mama so poor the ducks throw bread at her.

Man: "Is your body from McDonald's?"

Woman: "Why, because you're loving it?"

Man: "No, because it's fat and greasy."

My brother called me short and ugly, so I called him an ambulance.

What do vacuums and your mom have in common?

They both suck.

My girlfriend called me pedophile today.

Big word for a 12-year-old.

Your mum is so old that when I told her to act her age, she died.

I saw a fat dude wearing a shirt that said "guess." I said 215kg, he didn't find it as funny.

"You look like you've lost some weight."

"Really? Well, whatever weight I lost, you found it, pal!"

You are what happens when women drink during pregnancy.

Yo mama so ugly!

The mime broke his 30 year streak of silence!!!!

bully: "Your life's a joke."

me: "My life's not a joke, jokes have meaning."

Yo mama so ugly she the reason why Slender Man has no eyes.

A guy is sitting at a bar when a drunk man walks up to him, calling his mom a whore. The guy just ignores it and stays in his spot drinking his beer. An hour goes by and the drunk man comes back saying, "Your mom is a whore!" The guy sitting looks around the bar, sees people staring and says, "Don't worry, everything is cool here," and shrugs it off. After a few more shots, the drunk man walks up a third time and says, "Your mom... is such... a whore!" The guy finally gets mad, throws his fist on the table and says, "You know what? Go home Dad!"

Your adopted.