INS jokes
You look like the type of guy to wash his/her hands after a shower! (And don't write in the comments that there are more than 2 genders.)
I was walking in a park today and a little girl I asked, "Where are your parents?" She said, "Gone. My dad went to go get the milk and never came back," and I said, "Oof."
What do you and Joe Biden have in common?
Nobody loves you or him.
The "w" in Africa is for water.
What do a circle and a sphere have in common?
They're round, and round is a shape.
Why can't an orphan be in a Scream movie?
It's always someone you know.
Your momma is so fat, she was in a movie and the screen broke!
Why do orphans like Monopoly?
To cry about the money they can’t earn in real life.
The toothbrush says, "I have the worst job in the whole world."
The toilet paper behind him says, "Yeah, right."
Why couldn't the toilet paper cross the road?
'Cause it was stuck in the crack... *buttcrack*
Your mom is so small that she can fit in the luggage.
I thought I had the best K/D ratio in my fighter jet on Battlefield, then I heard about Mohammed Atta.
What do you call a fat spеaky in a wheelchair spеaky chair?
Would you rather listen to Justin Bieber or die in the slowest and most painful way possible?
They're the same thing.
Lol, the Twin Towers ordered a drop in from Pizza Hut, but instead they got a hot and ready from Jet's.
My dad said, "Where's Pickles, the family cat?" I said, "I'm sorry to say he's in the sky." He said, "Oh, I see, he passed away." No, I strapped him to 20 fireworks!
I was absolutely fuming when I found out my mate was rifling through my mum's knicker drawer.
No one goes in there without my permission!
What's the difference between an orphan and Daniel Larusso?
At least Daniel has a mom.
What's the difference between a goat and a sex slave?
I don't have a slave in my sex dungeon.
How do I make my dick disappear?
I put it in your dad.