Infant jokes

How many babies does it take to paint a wall red?

Depends on how hard you throw them.

How do you stop a baby from crawling around in circles? You nail its other hand to the ground.

How many babies does it take to paint a wall?

Depends on how hard you throw them. XD

What is red and goes 200 miles per hour?

A baby in a blender.

How many babies does it take to paint a wall red?

It depends on how hard you throw them.

Most people smother babies with love.

I smother them with pillows.

I was gonna tell a dead baby joke, but I decided to abort.

What's red and white and lives in a blender?

A baby.

What is 6 inches long and makes women scream? Stillbirth...

Chuck Norris built the hospital he was born in.

How do you stop a baby from drowning?

-Lift up your foot.

What did the deaf, blind, mute, and paralyzed baby get for Christmas? AIDS.