Infant jokes
Why can't you fool an aborted baby?
Because it wasn't born yesterday.
I have eaten 6 babies, 9 adolescent children, and 2 infants in the past week ;p
What does the Peanut Butter Baby say?
"Ah!"
What does a gas grenade and a baby have in common?
They both squeal when you throw them.
What cries, is red, and is a pokey boi?
The baby you just feed nails to.
its so cute
How do you stop a baby from crying?
Throw a brick in its mouth.
What's the difference between a pile of babies and a Lamborghini?
I don’t have a Lamborghini in my garage...
What do you call a baby in the shower? A baby in the shower.
How are infants and chocolate alike? They'll both kill your dog.
What is the difference between a baby and a trampoline?
You take your shoes off to jump on one.
There's a truck full of babies. What's worse than that? One baby being alive. What's worse than that? That baby having to eat its way out. What's worse than that? That same baby coming back from seconds.
What sits in the corner and gets smaller and smaller? A baby with a potato peeler.
What's the difference between peanut butter and jam? You can't peanut butter your dick up a dead baby's ass.
What is round and squishy? A dead baby's head.
What's the grossest thing ever?
A bag of dead babies.
What's even more gross?
The bottom one is still wriggling!
How do you get ten babies in a bucket?
With a blender.
What is the worst thing about licking a bald fanny?
Putting the nappy on afterwards.
Weenis long.
Rock-a-bye dummy, in the tree top.
When the wind blows, the cradle will rock.
When the bough breaks, the cradle will fall.
Down will come dummy, cradle and all.
Baby 🍼