Industry jokes
Today I passed the exams to be a funeral director!
Too bad it's a dying trade. :)
Why did the rapper open a bakery?
Because they wanted to bake some BEATS.
Suicidal people are a big contributor to the rope making industry.
- I work with animals.
- Great! What job?
- A butcher.
I got fired from the bowling ball factory for throwing out the ones that had holes in them.
Did you hear about the cheese factory explosion?
There was nothing left but de-brie.
Why did the rapper always carry a map?
So he could navigate his way through the rap game.
Porn.
As a lifelong farmer, I was excited that Ligue 1 was moving up the UEFA ranking toward an Industrial Revolution and I can finally leave the farm. Alas, Pessi joined and we went down a rank because he is so finished. Shame on you Pessi, now I have to go back to shoveling cow shit.
"I work with animals," a man said on his Tinder date. "That's so sweet," she replies. "I love a man who works with animals. Where do you work?" "At the butcher shop!"
I just gotta come out and say it: I like miners, and I don’t care what y’all think. I mean the fact that they are risking their lives just to make ours a little easier is amazing. I’ve always wanted to marry one, to be honest. Y’all need to give more respect to the mining ⛏ community.
Why don't rappers ever become bankers?
Because they always break the BARS!
I work at a tire shop.
I'm pretty tired.
Despite Michael Jackson’s legal problems while he was alive, McDonald’s is still going to honor his life achievements in the music industry by naming a sandwich after him.
They’re going to call it the McMichael! It’s going to be a fifty year old piece of meat pressed between two eight year old buns.
Why were parts of the Soviet Union that had more industry than agriculture occupied during WW2?
They couldn't beet the Nazis.
"Dababy midget porn."
Ever had that feeling that suicidal people are a big contributor to the razor blade industry?
Well, they aren't.
Why?
They aren't repeated customers.
Want to hear a joke about construction?
Sorry, I'm still working on it.
I just quit my job at a can crushing factory.
It was soda-pressing.
What do a 100-year-old pornstar and The White Stripes have in common? Icky Thump!