Incest

Incest jokes

Girlfriend

One day my girlfriend and I were just hanging out and she needed to tell our dad that we were going out.

Reason

The only reason why Murrikkkunts think Canada isn't free is because incest is illegal in Canada, in which one can face a sentence as long as 14 years in prison if convicted.

Uncle

Your girlfriend/boyfriend says: "I'm dating your uncle..." You start crying and you look under the bed and your uncle says: "Damn."

Hive

I saw a girl at my job and we ended up fucking, then the test came back and I have hives from my sister.

Daddy

Cindy goes up to her dad and says: "Daddy, can I have $100 for a new dress?"

Her dad almost gags and says: "$100! You're only 12, what do you want with such an expensive dress?"

Cindy says: "Well daddy, I'll look really pretty in it and I promise to look after it ..."

Dad gives in and says: "OK, give me a head-job then".

He flops it out and Cindy just get the end in her mouth and goes: "Eeee-yooo - that taste's like shit!"

Dad goes: "Well, your brother wanted to borrow the car this afternoon ..."

  • 3
  • Open

    Is it incest if it’s out in the open?

    Or is it... outcest?

    Sex

    What is the worst part about siblings having sex?

    Being left out.

    Family

    People always ask what the secret of our family's happiness is. It is simple really.

    1. Television and computer games are limited to a couple of hours each week.

    2. We all give each other a hand when needed.

    Last but not least, we play Twister.

    Family

    My family is lucky I was born so smart. Every time my Dad is struggling at work, he always turns to me when he needs to get ahead.

    Dad

    My Dad pays a lot of attention to our household and has always had a good eye for detail. He was the one that first noticed that my mother and I have the same ring size.

    Family

    These days, dating life is hard. You put yourself out there, and it's hard to find someone. The only thing to do is turn to family.