What do alcoholics and amputees have in common?
They are both legless.
In Common Jokes
What do Viagra and Disneyland have in common?
They both cause you to stand around for an hour waiting for a two-minute ride.
What do gay men and drug dealers have in common?
They both get a lot of crack.
What do sex and food have in common?
Grandma makes both better.
What do emos and unsalted popcorn have in common?
They're both white and flavorless.
What do people that can only use half their face and wankers have in common?
They have both had a few strokes.
What does gum in my d*ck have in common?
Both get chewed on by little kids.
What does Michael Jackson and Chef from South Park have in common?
They both say "Hello children!"
What does an autistic kid and a porn video have in common? You can shoot both of them, just not in public.
What do world hunger and a Mercedes have in common?
Princess Diana couldn't stop both of them.
What do orphans have in common with mute children?
They can't talk to their parents.
What does a Catholic Priest and a commercial from the 80s have in common? They both ask people, "Where's the meat?"
What does Jesus have in common with Pinocchio?
They believe their own lies.
What do volcanoes and suicide bombers have in common?
They both erupt when triggered.
What do ICE and Mexican drug cartels both have in common?
They both kidnap Canadian women!
What do orphans and TVs have in common?
At least one of them has a home.
What does 2016 and 2020 have in common?
A monkey caused worldwide outrage.
What do a pimp and a farmer have in common?
They both need a hoe to stay in business.
What do slinkies and the handicapped have in common?
They are the most fun when pushed down a flight of stairs.
Joe: What do the Leafs and the Titanic have in common?
Ben: I don't know.
Joe: They both look good until they hit the ice.
