When I went to see the doctor, he remarked that he hadn't seen me in a while. I said that I have been ill
rape victim: i want to die
man: hang in there
rape victim: thats what ill do, ill hang myself
A man has a terminal illness and isn't sure how long he has left to live, so he talks to his doctor. The man asks "How long am I going to live?" The doctor says "Depends, what time is it?" The doctor then looks at his watch and says"10" The man asks "Ten what?" Then the doctor keeps going"6, 5, 4, 3, 2, 1"
imagine this senario: a doctor walks in and tells the patient that he has all the illnesses in the world like this: "you have depression, diarrhea, cancer,... etc" and then the last one on the list is that he is deaf.
I remember having a crush on my math teacher so i winked at her and said "dont worry babe, ill callculater."
knock knock whos there? lettuce lettuce who? lettuce in and ill tell ya
Patient: doctor every time I look in a mirror, I feel ill, as if I'm about to throw up what's wrong with me? Doctor: I don't know but your eyesight is perfect.
Gf:babe,do you love me Bf:count the stars and thats how much i love you\\ Gf:but its morning sweetie.... Bf:Exactly Gf: :0,Ill take that as a no
Mom:its time for sleep.Baby:is that what you think huh.Mom:*gives baby pacifier*.Baby:nice try hobo.Mom:well ill come back later to see if hes gone asleep.*few hours later*Baby:*still awake* Mom:why IS HE NOT ASLEEP?!.Baby:Lol i told you nice try haha
lets tell a secret about each other...ill go first i hate you
There are 3 Genders
1: Man
2: Woman
3: Mentally ill
someone: stop making jokes about sh!
me; OH sorry man, ill cut it out, ill cut it out deep
my ill sis said why did the bear said no to ice cream and I said why she said cuz it stuffed
Why Did The Skeleton Have No Friends? He Was A Boner! Heheheh! Ah, See Ya Soon Kiddo. Im Goin On Break. Ill Give You Some Fried Snow Later!
me and my friend roasting each other, friend: you look like a baboon, me: stop talkin you look likea gorilla so i might call animal control on you and ill be seeing you at the zoo!
To All The Naruto Fans:
sharingan is red rasengan are blue if you dare touch my daughter ill chidori you
roses are red violets are blue a face like yours belongs in the zoo but don't you worry ill be there to not in a cage but laughing at you
Why did the rapper carry an umbrella?
In case of ILL RHYMES
How do you leave an idiot in suspense - ill tell you tomorrow
God when terminally ill children beg him to heal them
God: No, I don’t want to
